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Chag kasher v'sameach, Happy Passover

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2014 11:30 pm
by Hebrew Hammer
Begins tomorrow evening, a holiday of freedom. A time to rejoice in our freedom and be grateful for our nation that provides and allows us so much; and, also, to reflect on how many are still in slavery today, whether actual slaves, by war, or corrupt government, and all that holds each of us back from living the full life that God wants us to live.

At the seder, we eat foods that remind us of slavery and of freedom. For freedom, we should eat the finest foods. Hence the Passover brisket, which is what on holidays they serve in heaven. For those of you who favor Texas-style brisket, your palate is either inferior or uneducated. My people know a thing or two about smoked meats and fishes and, when it comes time to serve food fit for kings, we serve Passover brisket.

Andy's standard brisket recipe:

1 whole brisket
2 onions, chopped
2 tablespoons olive oil
1/2 cup balsamic vinegar
2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
Salt to taste (remember, kosher brisket is already salted)

Toss chopped onions into pan with the brisket, drizzle on the liquid and sprinkle on the salt. Cover tightly with aluminum foil and bake for 4 1/2 hours or more (brisket should almost flake). Carve against the grain.

The version served in heaven

1 whole brisket
1 large jar, sauerkraut (or more)
1 large can chopped tomatos (or more)
brown sugar

Pur sauerkraut and chopped tomatoes into pan with the brisket, sprinkle on the salt to taste. Cover tightly with aluminum foil and bake for 4 1/2 hours or more (brisket should almost flake). Carve against the grain.

Re: Chag kasher v'sameach, Happy Passover

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2014 11:37 pm
by seeahill
Thank you and happy Passover right back at ya.

The brisket recipes are, perhaps, not the finest example of Jewish cuisine extant.

Re: Chag kasher v'sameach, Happy Passover

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2014 11:43 pm
by DrDonkeyLove
I will be attending my first seder on Monday as an infidel amongst the chosen. My hosts are Reformed so they may be more open to a goyim, though apparently my presence is making a couple of people nervous.

Will there be libations? That's a critical part of any important meal for me.

Re: Chag kasher v'sameach, Happy Passover

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2014 11:59 pm
by Hebrew Hammer
DrDonkeyLove wrote:I will be attending my first seder on Monday as an infidel amongst the chosen. My hosts are Reformed so they may be more open to a goyim, though apparently my presence is making a couple of people nervous.

Will there be libations? That's a critical part of any important meal for me.
First, goyim is plural, goy is singular, shiksa is singular female, shaygetz is singular male.

Second, gentiles are welcome at Seders. Probably 5 or so of our 17 guests will be gentile. They generally know twice as much as the Jews as they actually read the bible.

Third, with reform, they do what they want, so who knows. Hopefully, they're not liberals who will talk about sexism as a new form of slavery.

Fourth, the obligation is to drink four full cups of wine. Depending on how discerning your hosts are, though, it may be 4 glassed of Manischewitz grape. If that's the case, have a drink beforehand and sip the wine politely and quickly at each call-out for the four cups.

Re: Chag kasher v'sameach, Happy Passover

Posted: Mon Apr 14, 2014 11:52 am
by Bob Wildes
[quote="Hebrew Hammer"][quote="DrDonkeyLove"]I will be attending my first seder on Monday as an infidel amongst the chosen. My hosts are Reformed so they may be more open to a goyim, though apparently my presence is making a couple of people nervous.



Second, gentiles are welcome at Seders. Probably 5 or so of our 17 guests will be gentile. They generally know twice as much as the Jews as they actually read the bible.


So you are saying that Jews are like Roman Catholics in at least one instance?

Re: Chag kasher v'sameach, Happy Passover

Posted: Mon Apr 14, 2014 1:02 pm
by Hebrew Hammer
Bob Wildes wrote:
Hebrew Hammer wrote:
DrDonkeyLove wrote:I will be attending my first seder on Monday as an infidel amongst the chosen. My hosts are Reformed so they may be more open to a goyim, though apparently my presence is making a couple of people nervous.



Second, gentiles are welcome at Seders. Probably 5 or so of our 17 guests will be gentile. They generally know twice as much as the Jews as they actually read the bible.


So you are saying that Jews are like Roman Catholics in at least one instance?
Good point. It's the protestants who read the bible.

Re: Chag kasher v'sameach, Happy Passover

Posted: Tue Apr 15, 2014 1:52 am
by DrDonkeyLove
My seder is complete. Delightful people and wonderful time. The sweet wine sucks monkey balls but the desserts made up for it.

Re: Chag kasher v'sameach, Happy Passover

Posted: Tue Apr 15, 2014 6:32 pm
by Fat Cat
Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn