The couch thread

powerlifter54 · Post by **powerlifter54** » Fri Aug 25, 2006 12:11 am

johno wrote:Xfit had a deadlift day this week. No 700's were posted. But I saw one 520.

Those were Kgs, not lbs, and they had deadlifted since Thanksgiving.

powerlifter54 · Post by **powerlifter54** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 3:26 am

Saw somebody in gym doing horrible looking lightweight oly lifts as part of a circuit.

i felt chilled to the bone because i knew what was coming. i couldn't stop from asking what they were doing. @fit.

So...

Once upon an afternoon dreary, while I trained, incredibly weak and weary,
Over many a quaint and curious volume of Westside lore,
While I rested, nearly napping, suddenly there came a slapping,
As of someone gently rapping, rapping at the weightroom floor.
" 'Tis some mullet," I muttered, "slapping at my weightroom floor;
Only this, and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I remember, it was in the month before September,
And each separate writhing mullet wrought its ghost upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished the morrow; vainly I had sought to borrow
From my Ipod surcease of sorrow, sorrow for the mullets on the floor
For the rare and radiant Couch who makes them pukey and oh so sore,
Nameless here forevermore.

And the silken sad fate jangling from each bumper plate
Thrilled me---filled me with fantastic terrors never felt before;
So that now, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating,
" 'Tis some Mullet entreating entrance at my weightroom door,
Some X-games wannabee entreating entrance at my weightroom door.
This it is, and nothing more."

Presently my soul grew stronger; hesitating then no longer,
"Sir," said I, "or madam, truly your forgiveness I implore;
But the fact is, I was training, and so gently you came straining,
And so loudly you came slapping, slapping weights on my weightroom flloor
That I scarce was sure I heard you." Here I opened wide the door;---
Pukey there, and nothing more.

Deep into the darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing
Doubting, dreaming dreams no mortals ever dared to dream before;
But the silence was unbroken, and the stillness gave no token,
And the only word there spoken was the whispered word,
Couch?, This I whispered, and an echo murmured back the word,
@fit... Merely this, and nothing more.

40k?

Dave · Post by **Dave** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 3:33 am

=D> =D> =D>
incredible

GoDogGo! · Post by **GoDogGo!** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 3:43 am

=D> $\:D/$ =D> $\:D/$ =D> $\:D/$

GDG!

mrzero · Post by **mrzero** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 4:04 am

Files into danger and a a Poet, amazing Boss, amazing.

some ninja needs to nugget this.

DrDonkeyLove · Post by **DrDonkeyLove** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 4:22 am

This and G's great Hamlet soliloquy deserve a special literary corner in the Nugget section.

johno · Post by **johno** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 4:08 pm

LOL. No shit, I really did laugh outloud.

=D> =D> =D>

Ross Hunt · Post by **Ross Hunt** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 4:52 pm

LOL!

Regardless of whatever one might think about the argument, you've elevated this to an art form, Jack.

Mickey O'neil · Post by **Mickey O'neil** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 8:10 pm

=D> =D> =D> =D> Outstanding Jack, absolutely outstanding!

bill fox · Post by **bill fox** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 8:38 pm

Nice Jack.

Crust Bucket · Post by **Crust Bucket** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 11:31 pm

Nice one Jack-copied and saved- for all the martial artists out there that have been doing @fit cuz they heard it's the greatest thing since the heavybag.

stosh · Post by **stosh** » Sun Aug 27, 2006 11:50 pm

Bravissimo, Jack.

johno · Post by **johno** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 6:41 am

On the other hand, Xfit may be a very practical approach for troops deployed to the field.

http://www.crossfit.com/cf-journal/Aust ... Aug-06.pdf

...and no making fun of Princess Patricia's Light Infantry - they kicked ass in Afghanistan. In Operation Anaconda, their snipers may have prevented another Black Hawk Down type debacle.

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 12:22 pm

You know, I read that and the previous study they did.

Basically, what it all comes down to is that "modern" methods of soldier conditioning (the long jogs, the medium intensity calisthenics, and the gym access where you can do bodybuilding) is less effective than something with a bit more grit.

Only recently has the military become open to questions regarding soldier fitness and willing to try new stuff. The "Austere" stuff is a good start for improving overall physical readiness, in my opinion. A soldier needs to be mobile and enduring. He doesn't need to be superstrong and ripped.

I look back at what my old man did in the Marine Corps, and it's a lot more intense and combat-specific than the stuff today. I bet you could take a 1950s era Marine and drop him into the type of training they do today, and he'd have a pretty easy time of it.

-full gear forced marches
-boxing
-pugil sticks
-bayonet drilling
-calisthenics + medicine balls
-recreational sports
-obstacle courses with real rope climbs
-squad races and competitions

Fat Cat · Post by **Fat Cat** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 7:26 pm

It's kinda odd, but in Mein Kampf, Hitler says that all recruits should be trained in boxing and jiujitsu to build aggressiveness.

powerlifter54 · Post by **powerlifter54** » Wed Aug 30, 2006 7:44 pm

At both the St John's school for wayward Boys and in flight school Fisticuffs was required. SJSFWB required boxing, judo, and wrestling for males. Flight school required boxing. All came down to at least one official mano v mano battle.

Released more aggression than it built at least for me. In both of the fianl boxing matchups i fought tall, thin lefties who bloodied me a bit on my mug. It is really true about how bodywork will bring down the tallest guy. i don't think i hit either guy on the chin but both were spitting blood after 3 rounds. Discovered how brutal that sport really is.

Not sure that is required anymore, but building a habitat for humanity house for a welfare recipient or monitoring a south American election probably is now.

Batboy2/75 · Post by **Batboy2/75** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 1:32 am

Fat Cat wrote:It's kinda odd, but in Mein Kampf, Hitler says that all recruits should be trained in boxing and jiujitsu to build aggressiveness.

Hitler knew what the fuck he was talking about in this rare instance.

JMO, but the best or elite infantry soldiers are the following:

1. Between the ages of 18 and 25.
2. Are discouraged from marriage.
3. Are kept seperate from support units and civilians.
4. Are selected via a selection process that eliminates those without testicular foritude and guts.
5. Are constantly told they are the best and held to that standard.
6. Train according to the ancient observations of the Roman Army "Their manuvuers were bloodless battles and their battles bloody manuvuers.
7. Live in communal barracks where the warrior male ethos is held sacred.
8. When not training are kept occupied with contact and combat sports in order to foster aggressiveness.

Sound Familiar?

Both the US Army Rangers & SS followed this format. Except in the case of the SS Himler encourage having tons of children with wives, misstress etc.

BB2/75

Fat Cat · Post by **Fat Cat** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 1:35 am

I prefer to be kept in a nice lounge, with snacks and pretty ladies. JMO.

Batboy2/75 · Post by **Batboy2/75** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 1:40 am

Fat Cat wrote:I prefer to be kept in a nice lounge, with snacks and pretty ladies. JMO.

What's funny is you live a life closer to the warrior ethos than 90% of the numnuts on that island.

BB2/75

Fat Cat · Post by **Fat Cat** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 1:48 am

I am an effete intellectual! Nothing more!

DBID · Post by **DBID** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 1:55 am

I would hazard a guess that "Live in communal barracks where the warrior male ethos is held sacred." is some sort of code speak for gay sex.

Fat Cat · Post by **Fat Cat** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 1:56 am

I'll let you hold my warrior male ethos for $50.

Batboy2/75 · Post by **Batboy2/75** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 2:05 am

Doughboy wrote:I would hazard a guess that "Live in communal barracks where the warrior male ethos is held sacred." is some sort of code speak for gay sex.

What ever makes you feel good about yourself Dough.

FYI-It's a system of control and helps develop Esprit De Corps. Kind of like a violent frat house with guns.

BB2/75

Batboy2/75 · Post by **Batboy2/75** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 2:09 am

Fat Cat wrote:I am an effete intellectual! Nothing more!

An effete intellecual w/ a blue belt in BJJ, stick fights, keeps his wife in line with Maytag discipline, favorite japanese story is "The 47 Ronin" and threatens people with being claw hammered?

Sure thing Makena.

BB2/75

DBID · Post by **DBID** » Thu Aug 31, 2006 2:10 am

Batboy2/75 wrote:
Doughboy wrote:I would hazard a guess that "Live in communal barracks where the warrior male ethos is held sacred." is some sort of code speak for gay sex.
What ever makes you feel good about yourself Dough.

FYI-It's a system of control and helps develop Esprit De Corps. Kind of like a violent frat house with guns.

BB2/75

Get off your high horse, Conan.