The couch thread

tzg · Post by **tzg** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 11:14 am

Shafpocalypse Now wrote:That's an awesome caption.

I just saw a private vid where the dude missed, what I am assuming to be the heavy work, and the second time he went to his knees and dropped it on the back of his leg, and was hopping around on one leg.

Serious idiocy.

On the one hand, I hope it was a reasonable weight (ie, not 165 or, heaven forbid, 135), but, on the other, for his own sake, I hope it wasn't...

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 1:16 pm

Forward to 11:50. Looks painful. I hope the dude didn't hurt himself seriously.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WLvyf64Wz5k[/youtube]

Kazuya Mishima · Post by **Kazuya Mishima** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 1:28 pm

I could respect these people if they were snatching 9,000 pounds or some incredible shit, but at the end of the day they are killing themselves by throwing around weight that is a warm-up set of curls for a fairly strong human.

I...just...don't...get...it.

And the clothes...the monkey-see-monkey-do gravitation toward everybody wearing the exact same stupid looking shit just is just unbelievable.

Mountebank · Post by **Mountebank** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 1:32 pm

Will someone please do a gif of that before the video gets locked away...slow-mo would be awesome.

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 1:36 pm

Someone downloaded it for posterity.

Hymen Asshole · Post by **Hymen Asshole** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 2:36 pm

Quack, MsHairyNutz is working on that

Hymen Asshole · Post by **Hymen Asshole** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 3:52 pm

trimmed and turned
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VrfbzvmwTs[/youtube]

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 5:27 pm

At least they're losing the bar behind them. That shows that they're committing to the pull and staying with the bar.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-k0NTB2DTGs[/youtube]

Hymen Asshole · Post by **Hymen Asshole** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 5:51 pm

For Quack

buckethead · Post by **buckethead** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 5:57 pm

WildGorillaMan wrote:At least they're losing the bar behind them. That shows that they're committing to the pull and staying with the bar.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-k0NTB2DTGs[/youtube]

Well done sir

Jonny Canuck · Post by **Jonny Canuck** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 6:08 pm

WildGorillaMan wrote:At least they're losing the bar behind them. That shows that they're committing to the pull and staying with the bar.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-k0NTB2DTGs[/youtube]

Best Video ever! Diemond Dave is hilarious!

kreator · Post by **kreator** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 6:55 pm

I see he's wearing a belt while snatching.

I guess he didn't take the Crossfit Belt Certification.

powerlifter54 · Post by **powerlifter54** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 6:57 pm

The idiocy of doing the heaviest snatches after pre-exhausting with 120 lighter snatches is par for the course.

Jonny Canuck · Post by **Jonny Canuck** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 7:06 pm

not to sure if you guys still checking out pukie's fb page but now he is going after OPT. I guess Pukie and couch believe CF is better off having guys like Bob Harper and Ochocinco in the ranks than OPT, Rippetoe, John Wellbourne and Robb Wolfe.

kreator · Post by **kreator** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 7:42 pm

It's time for some personality analysis.
Let's look at some of the phrasing and typography used by the poster of the "Pukie" account:

Andrew,
Did John Jesse combine muscle-ups, snatches, clean and jerks, sprints, and the like into timed or scored events that athletes compete in as sport?

Typing the first person's name on its own line, followed by a snotty response / rhetorical question. Glassman.
Saying the much pompous-sounding "as sport" instead of saying "as a sport" like most native English speakers. Classic Glassman.

Furthermore, did he develop a measurable definition of fitness and health?

Glassman's pride and joy is development of the hopper/broad modal domains/10 components model. So naturally he'd defend his plagiarism by bringing this up pretty early in the counterargument.

And if that's not Fran, then I'm not a retching clown with a penchant for pull-ups.

Sarcasm. Use of the word "penchant." It's grammatically correct, but really how many people do you know that have used this word?

Other examples where Glassman has used "penchant":
"While admitting a penchant for iconoclasm"
"We've not mentioned here our penchant for jumping..."
"Your first exposure to Fran reveals her penchant for throwing a beating"

Feel free to Google them.

You conflated several key points. The "Fran" panel illustrates that Fitzie programs Fran without crediting it as such. Fitzie's done this before. Remember, people are paying him money for these workouts.

Second, Fitzie IS using CrossFit's name to sell a course. The evidence is in Panel 3. He's not a CrossFit affiliate, so he has no legal right to use CrossFit to sell his training. Fitzie is fine with using CrossFit when it brings in clients, but not ok with calling CrossFit workouts by name.

There's something about property theft that stirs up old emotions.

Giving names to people that they aren't actually known by -- Glassman.

Using the term "property theft" as opposed to the much more commonly used word, "plagiarism" -- Glassman. Feel free to Google other instances where he's used this phrase.

Josh,
I'm starting to doubt your sincerity. Or intelligence. Maybe both.

See first quote.

Lastly, do you understand that running a 5:30 mile on a street is more difficult than running the same speed on a track?

Raising minute details that actually aren't true. Glassman.

Josh, I'm almost proud, that's a new tactic! You've moved on from red herrings to rehasing old arguments.

See first quote.

David,
You are confused.

See first quote.

Carla,
Could you please explain to me the distinction between a sponsorship and an endorsement? Thanks.

Same as above.
Not to mention the fact that this response had nothing to do with the poster to which he was responding, who was asking why all his posts were negative in nature.

Sometimes, I want to feel bad for the guy. He's got money, glory, and fame. A ruined family and more enemies than Rush.

And despite all this, he trolls people under a Facebook alias.

tough old man · Post by **tough old man** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 7:43 pm

SOLD OUT

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Jonny Canuck · Post by **Jonny Canuck** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 7:46 pm

kreator wrote:It's time for some personality analysis.
Let's look at some of the phrasing and typography used by the poster of the "Pukie" account:

Andrew,
Did John Jesse combine muscle-ups, snatches, clean and jerks, sprints, and the like into timed or scored events that athletes compete in as sport?
Typing the first person's name on its own line, followed by a snotty response / rhetorical question. Glassman.
Saying the much pompous-sounding "as sport" instead of saying "as a sport" like most native English speakers. Classic Glassman.

Furthermore, did he develop a measurable definition of fitness and health?
Glassman's pride and joy is development of the hopper/broad modal domains/10 components model. So naturally he'd defend his plagiarism by bringing this up pretty early in the counterargument.

And if that's not Fran, then I'm not a retching clown with a penchant for pull-ups.

Sarcasm. Use of the word "penchant." It's grammatically correct, but really how many people do you know that have used this word?

Other examples where Glassman has used "penchant":
"While admitting a penchant for iconoclasm"
"We've not mentioned here our penchant for jumping..."
"Your first exposure to Fran reveals her penchant for throwing a beating"

Feel free to Google them.

You conflated several key points. The "Fran" panel illustrates that Fitzie programs Fran without crediting it as such. Fitzie's done this before. Remember, people are paying him money for these workouts.

Second, Fitzie IS using CrossFit's name to sell a course. The evidence is in Panel 3. He's not a CrossFit affiliate, so he has no legal right to use CrossFit to sell his training. Fitzie is fine with using CrossFit when it brings in clients, but not ok with calling CrossFit workouts by name.

There's something about property theft that stirs up old emotions.
Giving names to people that they aren't actually known by -- Glassman.

Using the term "property theft" as opposed to the much more commonly used word, "plagiarism" -- Glassman. Feel free to Google other instances where he's used this phrase.
Josh,
I'm starting to doubt your sincerity. Or intelligence. Maybe both.
See first quote.

Lastly, do you understand that running a 5:30 mile on a street is more difficult than running the same speed on a track?
Raising minute details that actually aren't true. Glassman.

Josh, I'm almost proud, that's a new tactic! You've moved on from red herrings to rehasing old arguments.
See first quote.

David,
You are confused.
See first quote.

Carla,
Could you please explain to me the distinction between a sponsorship and an endorsement? Thanks.
Same as above.
Not to mention the fact that this response had nothing to do with the poster to which he was responding, who was asking why all his posts were negative in nature.

Sometimes, I want to feel bad for the guy. He's got money, glory, and fame. A ruined family and more enemies than Rush.

And despite all this, he trolls people under a Facebook alias.

i'd rather have him trolling teh internetz than hitting the bottle. hopefully he isn't doing both.

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 8:00 pm

I think it's fucking awesome Greg's back posting anonymously. I'm not going to text him too much more often, since I guess I wouldn't like some asshole texting me being a smart as all the time, either.

But, man, the Pukie shit is funny to me, but not the way GG's intending it to be funny.

Yes I Have Balls · Post by **Yes I Have Balls** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 8:33 pm

Straight from Couch's mouth. Such brilliance:

http://www.board.crossfit.com/showthrea ... 293&page=7

Phil,

We go way back to the early days of CF Santa Cruz, so I’m going to try to help you make sense of what has happened with FGB by way of an analogy that a good cop like yourself might find useful.

Imagine if I steal your car and change the VIN and then go to the Department of Motor Vehicles and successfully register the car. Understand that doesn’t make it mine. Get that? It’s really that easy. For the record, I’m going to attribute your failure to comprehend as a simple intellectual shortcoming and not as a character flaw. I get where IP is a difficult thing for many to grok.

And whether you get that or not, the courts will. SZ and his attorneys get it and have asked for an out immediately after their first loss in court. It’s not coming.

But forget all of that; it’s not my problem, really, but yours.

Here’s my problem, and it’s near insurmountable. You’ve attributed motives and behaviors to me and staff that make it impossible for us to continue our business relationship. I wouldn’t do business with us as you have described us and I certainly won’t do business with someone who sees nothing but greed in our efforts, and finds little value to the relationship.

The accounting team will cut you a check for $4,000 to cover your total payments to CF Inc. years 2008, 2009, 2010, and 2011. At your earliest convenience you can replace your signage and remove related use of the CF name. The termination notice will provide details of our expectations.

I wish you the best of luck and sincerely hope that you’ll find success inside and outside of your gym.

One last thing, I’m calling bull**** on your claim of lots of weak, brand-wrecking, affiliates surrounding your box. I know better even if you don’t. I can name several in close proximity that have worlds to teach you about running a gym and training. I’d have focused my attention on them were I you.

Gary John · Post by **Gary John** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 8:38 pm

Thanks for the Pukie/Glasshole joy.

All the money, the snatch, the drugs, the booze..........

He can't keep his ego out of posting dumb shit.

You can't undue being a total asshole. It is branded on his forehead and it won't wash off.

This thread, as always, is saved by our beloved Couch.

I'd Hit It · Post by **I'd Hit It** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 8:42 pm

Poor Phil. As soon as he started his thoughtful, polite, well-reasoned objections I knew it was going to be over for him.

The Crawdaddy · Post by **The Crawdaddy** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 8:57 pm

What a knee-jerk response over someone having a questioning attitude. Over-sensitive much?

KingSchmaltzBagelHour · Fri Mar 02, 2012 9:22 pm

...and Phil is on the Couch Thread more than Jay, Quack, Hymen, and WGM combined in 3,2,1...

WildGorillaMan · Post by **WildGorillaMan** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 10:07 pm

I've never seen someone get fired on an Internet forum before. That's got to be a first.

Alfred_E._Neuman · Post by **Alfred_E._Neuman** » Fri Mar 02, 2012 10:15 pm

Hymen Asshole wrote:trimmed and turned
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VrfbzvmwTs[/youtube]

What a waste of Eleiko equipment.

IGX

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