The Man with the Iron Fists

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KingSchmaltzBagelHour
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The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by KingSchmaltzBagelHour »

Fans of Wu Tang may be interested in this movie.
Looks like Rza wrote directed and stars with Tarantino producing.
There's a promotional tumblr with loads of interviews and old school Kung fu movie clips.
http://www.rzaironfists.com/


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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by KingSchmaltzBagelHour »

Movie looks mad cheesy IMO, but I'm not really a karate flick fan.

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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

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We watched it this past weekend and all I can say is FUCKING AWESOME INSTANT CULT CLASSIC.
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Kazuya Mishima »

Fat Cat wrote:We watched it this past weekend and all I can say is FUCKING AWESOME INSTANT CULT CLASSIC.
You being for reals, bro? I've stayed away because I heard it was shit. I'm willing to take a peek if you liked it.

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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Fat Cat »

I heard it was shit too, but it's fuckin crazy like Master of the Flying Guillotine over the top style.
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Kazuya Mishima »

I can handle that.

I need something to wash my brain of Donnie Yen's 'Dragon' (Wu Xia). I bought it last week, and I didn't enjoy it one bit.

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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

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Kazuya Mishima wrote:I can handle that.

I need something to wash my brain of Donnie Yen's 'Dragon' (Wu Xia). I bought it last week, and I didn't enjoy it one bit.
Really? I was thinking of watching that on PPV this week. Moderately bummed.
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Fat Cat »

Kazuya Mishima wrote:I can handle that.

I need something to wash my brain of Donnie Yen's 'Dragon' (Wu Xia). I bought it last week, and I didn't enjoy it one bit.
this is the OTHER kind of stupid violent kung fu movie
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Kazuya Mishima »

baffled wrote:
Kazuya Mishima wrote:I can handle that.

I need something to wash my brain of Donnie Yen's 'Dragon' (Wu Xia). I bought it last week, and I didn't enjoy it one bit.
Really? I was thinking of watching that on PPV this week. Moderately bummed.
I've seen worse, but I've become a huge fan of Yen over the past few years and this really wasn't up to snuff compared to a lot of his recent offerings. The most interesting thing about the whole movie was the internal philosophical musings of the investigator. The action was a bit weak, and the story had some really nonsensical moments (even for a kung-fu movie).

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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

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Kazuya Mishima wrote:
baffled wrote:
Kazuya Mishima wrote:I can handle that.

I need something to wash my brain of Donnie Yen's 'Dragon' (Wu Xia). I bought it last week, and I didn't enjoy it one bit.
Really? I was thinking of watching that on PPV this week. Moderately bummed.
I've seen worse, but I've become a huge fan of Yen over the past few years and this really wasn't up to snuff compared to a lot of his recent offerings. The most interesting thing about the whole movie was the internal philosophical musings of the investigator. The action was a bit weak, and the story had some really nonsensical moments (even for a kung-fu movie).
I see. I'm a big Yen fan, too. I guess there's always going to be a turd now and then.

I'll catch Man With The Iron Fists instead.
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

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Fat Cat might be the first person I've seen that actually claims to like this movie. Everyone else, even fans of the classic kung fu movies, seems to hate it.

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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

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When it comes to kung fu movies, I am not a fan. I am a participant.
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Kazuya Mishima »

Fat Cat wrote:When it comes to kung fu movies, I am not a fan. I am a participant.

Curious...what's your all-time top five favs (if you can even narrow it down that precise)?

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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Fat Cat »

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1. The Prodigal Son

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2. Mad Monkey Kung Fu

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3. 36 Chambers of Shaolin (aka Master Killer)

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4. Heroes Two

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5. Last Hurrah for Chivalry
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Fat Cat »

But let me say, those are 5 of my favorites, but already I am thinking of others that should be up there like Burning Paradise, Drunken Master II, Master of the Flying Guillotine, Lords of Wu Tang, Sword Stained with Blood, The Eight Diagram Pole Fighter, Dirty Ho, Five Fingers of Death, Come Drink with Me, etc.

I been doing this shit a long time.
Last edited by Fat Cat on Thu May 16, 2013 8:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

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Aw shit, why you gotta axe me dat? Wheels = turning.
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Kazuya Mishima »

My 10yo daughter freaking LOVES Mad Monkey Kung Fu...we will sit and watch it on a Friday or Saturday night about every 9 months or so. She thinks it's hilarious.

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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Fat Cat »

It's a great movie, good story and epic training scenes.
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Abandoned by Wolves »

Fat Cat wrote:But let me say, those are 5 of my favorites, but already I am thinking of others that should be up there like Burning Paradise, Drunken Master II, Master of the Flying Guillotine, Lords of Wu Tang, Sword Stained with Blood, The Eight Diagram Pole Fighter, Dirty Ho, Five Fingers of Death, Come Drink with Me, etc.

I been doing this shit a long time.
I loved "Prodigal Son" and "36th Chamber", really enjoyed "8 Diagram Pole Fighter" recently...but "Master Of the Flying Guillotine" is the ur-Kung Fu theater primal experience. It is so over the top and hard core that almost every other kung fu flick seems like a "Malibu Barbie's Dream House" commercial in comparison.
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

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syaigh wrote: The thought of eating that giant veiny monstrosity makes me want to barf.
You're an ASS!
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

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syaigh wrote: The thought of eating that giant veiny monstrosity makes me want to barf.
You're an ASS!
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Kazuya Mishima »

Crust Bucket wrote:Image
I'm down with that. I'm a huge Chiba fan, and I own a shit ton of his stuff on DVD. The Oyama karate trilogy is great, and I love his movie about Doshin So (The Killing Machine, aka Shorinji-Kempo).

Street Fighter is my favorite Chiba movie...so many great scenes...ripping the dick and balls off of that jigaboo rapist...sends a thrill up my leg I can tell ya.

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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Fat Cat »

Abandoned by Wolves wrote:
Fat Cat wrote:But let me say, those are 5 of my favorites, but already I am thinking of others that should be up there like Burning Paradise, Drunken Master II, Master of the Flying Guillotine, Lords of Wu Tang, Sword Stained with Blood, The Eight Diagram Pole Fighter, Dirty Ho, Five Fingers of Death, Come Drink with Me, etc.

I been doing this shit a long time.
I loved "Prodigal Son" and "36th Chamber", really enjoyed "8 Diagram Pole Fighter" recently...but "Master Of the Flying Guillotine" is the ur-Kung Fu theater primal experience. It is so over the top and hard core that almost every other kung fu flick seems like a "Malibu Barbie's Dream House" commercial in comparison.
If I ever decide to change jobs, I am going to become Fung Sheng Wu Chi.
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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Kazuya Mishima »

So, I finally got around to seeing this thing...god-fucking-damn-it.

Let's put it this way...what do you think would happen if some nigger who has never been to film school asks for $20 million so that he can go write and direct a fantasy kung fu movie in which he is the star? Well, if you can imagine how horribly wrong and fucked up that scenario can go then you can save yourself the trouble of watching this shit fest because that's exactly what happened.

Where to begin...let me start by saying that there is a WHOLE LOT of SHIT that is being passed through Hollywood with Quentin Tarantino's name attached to it. In fact, I'd say that the phrase "Quentin Tarantino presents" is just coded language for "Quentin used his clout to get another dogshit project greenlighted for production that should never have seen the light of day." Arguably, this is something that in concept could have really worked and been done right, but it was fucked from the very beginning because no one questioned the fact that this was directed by and starred by A FUCKING NIGGER THAT CAN'T DIRECT OR ACT.

You know you're really in trouble when the best performance is being put on by the guy that played fucking Ryu in 1994's 'Street Fighter'. Crowe was evidently praised by critics for his performance, but I didn't see it. In fact, the whole time I'm watching his bloated ass prance across the screen I'm thinking that this is the kind of shit paycheck work that Roger Moore had to do when he became too old to play James Bond. Crowe is too old and fat to play Gladiators or romantic leads, so I guess he's got to be the lecherous Englishman who eats the poontang of a semi-hot Asian hooker while she lays in a bathtub and uses his teeth to pull a string of beads out of her ass. I'm not shitting you...this happened...on screen.

The biggest flaw outside of the fact that they let RZA come within 500 miles of a movie set is that the movie gives you absolutely no one to cheer for. Each and every character is either a flawed asshole that you can't stand, or a nice guy that's not given enough screen time for the audience to learn anything about. The best part of the whole movie is when Dave Bautista uses a red hot broad sword to hack the dick beaters off of that sleepy eyed, chicken thief that wrote and directed this digitized turd. RZA may be the only director in the history of the world that could take a plainly gratuitous scene involving a bunch of Asian lovelies washing each other in a communal bath and somehow make it the most non-titillating and boring scene in the whole flick. I'm not shitting you...that really happened.

Hardcore kung fu movie fans will see some familiar memes and tropes. Bautista plays a character that is an homage to the old Shaw Brothers' "bronze men"...there is a late in the story character reveal that plays on the old Bak Mei/Pai Mei/Shaolin traitor character. Then there's just some stupid shit...that lantern jawed gook from the first 'Fast and Furious' movie plays X-BLADE...there's no indication as to why he's called X-BLADE since his weapons and armor don't look like the letter X...the only thing I can figure out is that X-BLADE sounds really cool to 14yo boys and that's exactly who this movie was written for.

The dialogue is groan inducing..."Your wounds are healing surprisingly quickly." The flashback scene showing RZA as a runaway slave with the almost unrecognizable Pam Grier playing his mammy is unintentionally funny while almost grinding the film to a standstill. What little action there is fails to save the day, and I found the choreography slow and uninspired. An early fight scene with Cung Le ripping a guy apart set a gruesome and impressive tone...and then the movie never really went back there. The entire soundtrack is predictable hip-hop, "nigga this, nigga that", monkey mumbling that sounds like stuff left in the waste bin from old Wu Tang projects.

I was right to have stayed away from this thing as long as I did, but I let weakness get the better of me and now I have two hours of my life that my eyeballs will never forgive me for.

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Re: The Man with the Iron Fists

Post by Holland Oates »

I watched this other day. It wasn't great but it sure as fuck wasn't good. The faggot ass hair on Silver Lion kept pissing me off. A coworker raved about this pile of shit. I know now not to take his fucking movie advice. Of course he thinks Quentin Tarantino is a genius.
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