The couch thread

[Kraj]

^ One of them looks like he should be working behind the counter of a Soviet butcher shop.

Couch looks like what Chuck Liddell will look like in 20 years when he REALLY lets himself go. They have the same body type.

[dead man walking]

time to accept that we're all just ignorant dumbfucks.

This website serves aims that can hardly be comprehended or appreciated by the overwhelming majority of the posters here. Oh well.

Comment #170 - Posted by: Coach at April 26, 2009 8:34 AM

[T200]

Fag:

Sprinting for Cheer

Hi,

I'm a male interested in trying out for my college's cheer squad and I talked to one of the coaches today and he said to train sprints for maximum acceleration/explosive power.

I've been doing Starting Strength for a few months so I have a relatively decent strength base but have never been a strong runner. I figured rather than jumping into this with no idea what to do I'd ask if anyone has any advice on sprint programs or something I can incorporate once or twice weekly to help with my explosiveness.

I searched but didn't really find any specifics. It seems most people just sort of pick a distance and sprint it 10 times. Is this the most effective? What would be most effective for my goals of improving my explosive power for tossing ladies into the air?

Thanks,
Philip

[JamesonBushmill]

"Prole, Sarah,

Caviston is having zero impact on my "personal" and financial interests, but his impact on the safety and operational readiness of future operators is significant and profoundly negative. He could best serve our country and the world by going back into academia where nothing he does will ever matter to anyone.

I cannot and will not give the specifics on the damage to operational readiness that Mr. Caviston has produced. I wish I could but cannot, will not.

..."

Comment #170 - Posted by: Coach at April 26, 2009 8:34 AM



Apparently Caviston is on double secret probation, and Cooch don't want no drunkin riots in his town.

[___________]

Fucking horseshit huckster Couch.
Fuck him.
He's such a fucking asshole, & has a penchant for trannies & gin.

[Damien]

Old Bones,

That seeing me naked is more important to you than ethics or the facts of the dispute is a suprise to me and "shows us all we need to know" about you.

If Mr. Caviston wants to do a side-by-side, shirtless, deadlift demonstration with me as a charity for Wounded Warrior Foundation, count me in. We'll videotape the demonstration and then you and Mike can "both do it" together.

Comment #79 - Posted by: couch at April 25, 2009 9:29 AM

So much for gay crossfitters being welcome.

Even the cult leader is a raging homophobic.

[Anon]

It used to be fun to point out the "cultness" of crossfit, now it's getting to be not all that funny. It's either going to collapse or go full on cult, I don't see a way out. All of these attacks are really just the slow and methodical grooming of the followers into the crossfit "belief system". This bullshit about the operators, heros and the fallen is nothing more than the wrapping on the manipulation that makes it more palletable (for some). The "smackdowns" that people who call bullshit is the classic response, somewhere out there is a young person who just learned you don't question the cooch. I suspect more learn that lesson than step back and go, "What the fuck have I attached myself to?" Boto and PD, good on you guys for actually seeing the light.

Check out this FAQ http://www.rickross.com/faq.html, lots of parallels, too many.

[Holy Cow]

It used to be fun to point out the "cultness" of crossfit, now it's getting to be not all that funny. It's either going to collapse or go full on cult, I don't see a way out. All of these attacks are really just the slow and methodical grooming of the followers into the crossfit "belief system". This bullshit about the operators, heros and the fallen is nothing more than the wrapping on the manipulation that makes it more palletable (for some). The "smackdowns" that people who call bullshit is the classic response, somewhere out there is a young person who just learned you don't question the cooch. I suspect more learn that lesson than step back and go, "What the fuck have I attached myself to?" Boto and PD, good on you guys for actually seeing the light.

Check out this FAQ http://www.rickross.com/faq.html, lots of parallels, too many.

+1

It's especially disturbing when Cooz literally says that people on his main site are ignorant and dumb, but he benevolently excuses their failings because he realizes they're simpletons -- and everybody eats it up and just loves him for it. I don't get it.

[dead man walking]

I cannot and will not give the specifics on the damage to operational readiness that Mr. Caviston has produced. I wish I could but cannot, will not.

Comment #170 - Posted by: Coach at April 26, 2009 8:34 AM

channeling joe mccarthy.

[Shafpocalypse Now]

I don't think Caviston was a great choice for that either, though he was excited as fuck to get the opportunity. Couch would claim seals need less practice with guns and specific tasks and better times on the girls.

To damage the operators ability to do their job, Caviston would have to implement a bunch of shit that wouldn't make any fucking sense to anybody. Caviston seems like he's smart enough not do that.

[Thud]

The "smackdowns" that people who call bullshit is the classic response, somewhere out there is a young person who just learned you don't question the cooch.

The new converts who are out to prove their worthiness to the cult are often the most aggressive defenders of the faith. It's the guys who've only been crossfitting for a month or two who excoriate anyone who does any form of body building. ("Dude, curls are so unfunctional. If your house is on fire and you need to outrun space aliens will you wish you'd done more curls? No!!!!") They're also the ones who know everything about equipment (as we all know, you'll never be "elite" unless you buy a 20# dynamax ball and an abmat from an affiliate) and diet. They've had the "stupid" smacked out of them and are eager to do the same to the next n00b to show they're worthy of promotion to honorable crossfit forum know-it-all status. And of course, they've yet to encounter the humbling injures and burnout that awaits them.

[Stillwater]

It's like an evolutionary chart of Crossfit women.

[Crust Bucket]

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Must bleach out my eyes now.....

[TerryB]

Caviston is having zero impact on my "personal" and financial interests, but his impact on the safety and operational readiness of future operators is significant and profoundly negative.

So, if you don't adhere to cultfit, you're hurting soldiers and, therefore, national security?

Does Couch ever point out precisely how this is supposedly happening?

What a fucking loon. I wonder if the people he attacks have any idea that there are large, intelligent groups of anti-culfitters. Or do they feel like they're getting swamped by this gin-swilling retard & his band of loony loyalists?

[GoDogGo!]

Funny thing, I was browsing through Siff's Supertraining last night and within only the first 25 pages, it was crushingly apparent that Couch is completely clueless and wrong about most things related to training and performance. Crushingly.

Siff owned Couch savagely. Then he died. Oh well.

[upsideyahead]

[GoDogGo!]

It used to be fun to point out the "cultness" of crossfit, now it's getting to be not all that funny. It's either going to collapse or go full on cult, I don't see a way out. All of these attacks are really just the slow and methodical grooming of the followers into the crossfit "belief system".
Check out this FAQ http://www.rickross.com/faq.html, lots of parallels, too many.

I think there's an old compound (it's a fixer-upper) and probably 100+ acres of jungle available in Guyana. PM Seahill for details on its history and exact location.

[Grandpa's Spells]

=D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D>

Unprecedented ten clappy post.

[Mickey O'neil]

=D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D>

Unprecedented ten clappy post.

LOLOLOL! =D> =D> =D> That was fantastic!

[Mickey O'neil]

Who does the hiring of "contract", or outside, trainers for the various branches of the military? I would think they would know how to train soldiers or know who to hire to train them but it looks like they just pick someone out of a hat. Pavel has a good track record for this type of training, Caviston I'm not sure about but seems to be a badass but I'm not sure the carryover and @fit = wtf?.

The guy over at Mountain Athlete seems to have a good grasp on this type of training as well.

Oh and btw, I hate couch and fagfit and all of the cultfit kool-aid drinkers. I really do.

[Holy Cow]

Thruster Hitler =

Great job.

[Holy Cow]

They're all bitching about a rounded back for a guy who's casually picking up the end of a log, like he's some kind of dangerous loon. Many videos of @Fitters' actual deadlifts show rounded backs.

I wonder what they would think of stone-lifting:

[rjudo]

ThrusterHitler! That was too fuckin' funny, many claps =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D>



Rick

[Gary John]

That video will get more attention than everything that has been said about Glasshole. Absolutely dead on funny.

We just need someone will skilz to do something with Dr. Evil.

[Shafpocalypse Now]

That was primo.

Primobolan with a parabolan chaser.