The couch thread

Kraj · Post by **Kraj** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:05 pm

This AllisonNYC bitch is seriously fucked in the head. WTF is she training for? WTF are ANY of them training for? All these CrossFit celebs do is train and talk about training. Well WTF is the point of any of it? If ever the words of 1960's establishment were valid, it's here - "Get a fuckin' job, you dirty hippies!" That's what I'd say to every one of those no-good fucktards who are continually training for shit that will never come.

This sloppy-titted slut Allison is the worst of the bunch. All she does is travel from cert to cert and suck every dick she encounters on the way. WTF is this fat whore trying to learn at all these certs? Is she going to compete in the Olympics? Is she getting paid big bucks to suit up for some professional sports team? Unless the answer to at least one of those questions is "yes" then this cow has no business devoting so much time to "training".

Being fit for everyday life doesn't take a fuckin' pHd. Eat less, work more. That's the formula that's worked for hundreds of generations, since the dawn of time. I don't need some crippled alcoholic and his disease-riddled minions to teach me that.

Mickey O'neil · Post by **Mickey O'neil** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:15 pm

Kraj wrote:This AllisonNYC bitch is seriously fucked in the head. WTF is she training for? WTF are ANY of them training for? All these CrossFit celebs do is train and talk about training. Well WTF is the point of any of it? If ever the words of 1960's establishment were valid, it's here - "Get a fuckin' job, you dirty hippies!" That's what I'd say to every one of those no-good fucktards who are continually training for shit that will never come.

This sloppy-titted slut Allison is the worst of the bunch. All she does is travel from cert to cert and suck every dick she encounters on the way. WTF is this fat whore trying to learn at all these certs? Is she going to compete in the Olympics? Is she getting paid big bucks to suit up for some professional sports team? Unless the answer to at least one of those questions is "yes" then this cow has no business devoting so much time to "training".

Being fit for everyday life doesn't take a fuckin' pHd. Eat less, work more. That's the formula that's worked for hundreds of generations, since the dawn of time. I don't need some crippled alcoholic and his disease-riddled minions to teach me that.

=D>

Dunn · Post by **Dunn** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:16 pm

If only I were this funktional.....

Dunn · Post by **Dunn** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:17 pm

Kraj wrote:This AllisonNYC bitch is seriously fucked in the head. WTF is she training for? WTF are ANY of them training for? All these CrossFit celebs do is train and talk about training. Well WTF is the point of any of it? If ever the words of 1960's establishment were valid, it's here - "Get a fuckin' job, you dirty hippies!" That's what I'd say to every one of those no-good fucktards who are continually training for shit that will never come.

This sloppy-titted slut Allison is the worst of the bunch. All she does is travel from cert to cert and suck every dick she encounters on the way. WTF is this fat whore trying to learn at all these certs? Is she going to compete in the Olympics? Is she getting paid big bucks to suit up for some professional sports team? Unless the answer to at least one of those questions is "yes" then this cow has no business devoting so much time to "training".

Being fit for everyday life doesn't take a fuckin' pHd. Eat less, work more. That's the formula that's worked for hundreds of generations, since the dawn of time. I don't need some crippled alcoholic and his disease-riddled minions to teach me that.

=D> =D> =D>

Oh to be a trust fund retard.

Thud · Post by **Thud** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:35 pm

Kraj wrote:This AllisonNYC bitch is seriously fucked in the head. WTF is she training for? WTF are ANY of them training for? All these CrossFit celebs do is train and talk about training. Well WTF is the point of any of it? If ever the words of 1960's establishment were valid, it's here - "Get a fuckin' job, you dirty hippies!" That's what I'd say to every one of those no-good fucktards who are continually training for shit that will never come.

This gets at the heart of the CF hate. If CF were just a class at the gym it would garner no more hate than a spin class or Tae-Kwan-Cardio. But sadly, for many, CF becomes and alternative lifestyle. It gives people a reason to live.

Barkey uses it to get out of the trailer park. Now she has a fit doucebag boyfriend that works in a gym rather than a fat greezball who works at Blockbuster. Whoohoo! She gets videos made about her and writes a blog that, were it not for CF, might otherwise be about her experiences with the Home Shopping Network.

Through CF people like her get a voice and an audience. They get to compete, and attention whores are by definition competative (they compete for your attention). The need to posture, and the benefit of having people look at them, want them, and be enrolled in their drama can't be underestimated.

CF fulfills so many needs that "fitness" can't touch.

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:36 pm

AllyBAT says she used to date older men with money, but that all changed with @F!

clem · Post by **clem** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:52 pm

Must be ME day at @fit

: badassness.jpg (109.67 KiB) Viewed 7159 times

POD · Post by **POD** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:53 pm

Kraj wrote:This sloppy-titted slut Allison is the worst of the bunch. All she does is travel from cert to cert and suck every dick she encounters on the way. WTF is this fat whore trying to learn at all these certs? Is she going to compete in the Olympics? Is she getting paid big bucks to suit up for some professional sports team? Unless the answer to at least one of those questions is "yes" then this cow has no business devoting so much time to "training".

She might not get paid like a professional athlete, but I wouldn't be surprised if she actually gets money for attending the "certs." She's publicity. Her job is to walk around and have big knockers - sort of like the unofficial CrossFit version of a Hooter's Girl.

Turdacious · Post by **Turdacious** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:57 pm

Dunn wrote:

If only I were this funktional.....

Strong work there Johno!

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Wed May 06, 2009 4:58 pm

That pic above is fucking terrible.

1. Look at the fucking wrists.
2. Look at the collapsed shoulders and spine
3. Look at how he's on top of his legs, not in between them.

@F slop, illustrated. Yet, that is badassness

Thud · Post by **Thud** » Wed May 06, 2009 5:23 pm

The Bastard Son of the Shafman wrote:That pic above is fucking terrible.

1. Look at the fucking wrists.
2. Look at the collapsed shoulders and spine
3. Look at how he's on top of his legs, not in between them.

@F slop, illustrated. Yet, that is badassness

Be fair, that bar may be empty, but it is a metal bar, not PVC. You have to expect some form breakdown on a max lift.

Crust Bucket · Post by **Crust Bucket** » Wed May 06, 2009 5:59 pm

I thought the guy without the pvc pipe was making like a bear in the woods.

The Venerable Bogatir X · Wed May 06, 2009 6:07 pm

clem wrote:Must be ME day at @fit
badassness.jpg

ALL YOU BRO!

odin · Post by **odin** » Wed May 06, 2009 6:16 pm

Dunn wrote:

If only I were this funktional.....

If I caught any cock-tard doing that on our station I'd bum some sense into him like he aint never been bummed before.

Plus it looks like the 5m ladder we give to the cadets to use. I don't like slating a comrade in arms but this is needed here.

TerryB · Post by **TerryB** » Wed May 06, 2009 6:38 pm

The Bastard Son of the Shafman wrote:That pic above is fucking terrible.

1. Look at the fucking wrists.
2. Look at the collapsed shoulders and spine
3. Look at how he's on top of his legs, not in between them.

@F slop, illustrated. Yet, that is badassness

FORM BREAKS DOWN AT THE BOUNDARIES OF INTENSITY!

Gin Master · Post by **Gin Master** » Wed May 06, 2009 7:00 pm

protobuilder wrote:
The Bastard Son of the Shafman wrote:That pic above is fucking terrible.

1. Look at the fucking wrists.
2. Look at the collapsed shoulders and spine
3. Look at how he's on top of his legs, not in between them.

@F slop, illustrated. Yet, that is badassness
FORM BREAKS DOWN AT THE BOUNDARIES OF INTENSITY!

No kidding, Shaf. What do you expect with forearms at vertical and the bar racked on the biceps? The neck strain and spinal flexion more than compensate for poor hip flexibility.

JohnnyBadAss · Post by **JohnnyBadAss** » Wed May 06, 2009 7:27 pm

Patrick Donnelly wrote:
Kraj wrote:Everyone who pays up the $1000 for the RRG should ask themselves "If multi-billion dollar insurance companies who underwrite risk for a living won't touch this, why am I?"
We should start emailing that (and additional information) to every single affiliate owner - they all have their websites with contact info listed on them, and they haven't even banned our IP's from posting on their daily comments, so that would be good too. If each of us spent just a few minutes, we could collect a couple dozen emails, then send it out. We could easily contact 500 affiliates, and then we'd even have the email addresses on hand for later mass messages.

Trolling on the CrossFit comments and boards is retarded. If you want to change anything, take out the colonies before going after the mother country.

I know where a big list of affiliate email addresses could be come by. Like 500ish. Though you can bet your email address will be blocked quickly and if you mass email them, you'll probably hit many spam lists. Think hard before you do anything like that, as entertaining as it would be for all.

Also, you elite IGxers...you are some entertaining bastages.

Shafpocalypse Now · Post by **Shafpocalypse Now** » Wed May 06, 2009 7:34 pm

First off, JohnnyBadAss, go and introduce your syphilitic, lous- ridden, pus-dicked carcass over on the FSF. Posting first in the couch thread is never going to come off well, because obviously you are yet another @F-based lurker who decided to join the fray.

Second, only PeeDee wants to email affiliates, probably because he feels betrayed and assraped by the state of the art folks over at the @F forums and their teeny tiny sneering fascist wannabe moderator. As the collective cum of the @F nation drips out his torn rectum, he feels the need to lash out. That Craigs list thing didn't work out well for him either, but he does have a brand new paying gig as a gut puncher.

In your introduction, please tell us how many chicks you banged at @F certs, and if you think paying the initial $1000 was worth it for the pussy.

Sofa King · Post by **Sofa King** » Wed May 06, 2009 7:47 pm

JohnnyBadAss wrote:
Patrick Donnelly wrote:
Kraj wrote:Everyone who pays up the $1000 for the RRG should ask themselves "If multi-billion dollar insurance companies who underwrite risk for a living won't touch this, why am I?"
We should start emailing that (and additional information) to every single affiliate owner - they all have their websites with contact info listed on them, and they haven't even banned our IP's from posting on their daily comments, so that would be good too. If each of us spent just a few minutes, we could collect a couple dozen emails, then send it out. We could easily contact 500 affiliates, and then we'd even have the email addresses on hand for later mass messages.

Trolling on the CrossFit comments and boards is retarded. If you want to change anything, take out the colonies before going after the mother country.
I know where a big list of affiliate email addresses could be come by. Like 500ish. Though you can bet your email address will be blocked quickly and if you mass email them, you'll probably hit many spam lists. Think hard before you do anything like that, as entertaining as it would be for all.

Also, you elite IGxers...you are some entertaining bastages.

Patty was already disciplined for this.
We infect (and affect) @fit by being who we are; not by being who they think we are. We liken it to watching the turd circling the bowl and not reaching in and helping it on its way down.

BTW, does ANYC know that couch planned her Level IV cert? Here's the curriculum:

Sofa King · Post by **Sofa King** » Wed May 06, 2009 7:49 pm

The Bastard Son of the Shafman wrote:First off, JohnnyBadAss, go and introduce your syphilitic, lous- ridden, pus-dicked carcass over on the FSF. Posting first in the couch thread is never going to come off well, because obviously you are yet another @F-based lurker who decided to join the fray.

Second, only PeeDee wants to email affiliates, probably because he feels betrayed and assraped by the state of the art folks over at the @F forums and their teeny tiny sneering fascist wannabe moderator. As the collective cum of the @F nation drips out his torn rectum, he feels the need to lash out. That Craigs list thing didn't work out well for him either, but he does have a brand new paying gig as a gut puncher.

In your introduction, please tell us how many chicks you banged at @F certs, and if you think paying the initial $1000 was worth it for the pussy.

=D> =D> =D>

Gin Master · Post by **Gin Master** » Wed May 06, 2009 8:00 pm

On second thought, Johnny, don't introduce yourself. Just don't post anymore. You don't gain admission by praising the membership. You gain it by posting porn, hate, and hopefully a little bit of knowledge and decent prose.

We're here to hate, not entertain. But when you're hating on a such a dysfunctional group of narcissistic, promiscuous fucktards, we entertain by default. It's all about botox, silicon, pvc, gin, money, and the clap. Their poster girl is Typhoid Mary with big tits and a good deadlift. Shit, they're parading amputees and porn stars around at their Gaymes. They're led by a mumbling invalid who fell off some monkey bars and into a bottle of Tanqueray back in 1977. We're not making this shit up. We're just chronicling it.

Mountebank · Post by **Mountebank** » Wed May 06, 2009 8:13 pm

clem wrote:Must be ME day at @fit
badassness.jpg

Somebody help me out...is that 19% form breakdown or 21%????

JohnnyBadAss · Post by **JohnnyBadAss** » Wed May 06, 2009 8:26 pm

Resident Quack wrote:
clem wrote:Must be ME day at @fit
badassness.jpg
Somebody help me out...is that 19% form breakdown or 21%????

Suppose that depends on whether he was injured or not.

JohnnyBadAss · Post by **JohnnyBadAss** » Wed May 06, 2009 8:27 pm

The Bastard Son of the Shafman wrote:First off, JohnnyBadAss, go and introduce your syphilitic, lous- ridden, pus-dicked carcass over on the FSF. Posting first in the couch thread is never going to come off well, because obviously you are yet another @F-based lurker who decided to join the fray.

Second, only PeeDee wants to email affiliates, probably because he feels betrayed and assraped by the state of the art folks over at the @F forums and their teeny tiny sneering fascist wannabe moderator. As the collective cum of the @F nation drips out his torn rectum, he feels the need to lash out. That Craigs list thing didn't work out well for him either, but he does have a brand new paying gig as a gut puncher.

In your introduction, please tell us how many chicks you banged at @F certs, and if you think paying the initial $1000 was worth it for the pussy.

Done. That was exactly the kind of greeting that I knew I'd get and which makes IGx a place I am proud to call myself a member of.

Gin Master, eat a dick.

Mountebank · Post by **Mountebank** » Wed May 06, 2009 8:27 pm

protobuilder wrote:Glassman agreed to a telephonic deposition but it's unclear from those documents if the deposition went forward and who he was testifying for. You can deduce that he agreed to testify for the Plaintiff and against the affiliate. If this is true, then Glassman knows he's got a problem with his affiliates. Yet he continues to sign up new affiliates ($$$) and allow them to wrecklessly train people under the Cultfit banner.

From the @F pet attorney:
http://www.crossfit.com/mt-archive2/004664.html

Some final points on the RRG:

1 - Folks need to understand that this isn't about HQ. CF HQ could buy a monster insurance policy from Lloyd's and protect itself...and leave the Affiliates twisting in the wind to the whim of the Affil's own insurance company. Instead, CF HQ has sunk an inordinate amount of money, energy, and time (my own included) into creating the structure so that the Affiliates can have the opportunity to protect themselves through this vehicle.
2 - I've had numerous conversation with people in other industries involving risk management who have done something similar (either a Captive Insurance Company or an RRG) and they all reported being exceedingly happen with the ability to control the defense of their industry and malpractice claims (think doctors and other professionals). This is not some exotic pyramid scheme - it's just that some of you haven't ever been sued for malpractice and don't understand what it means to be a "professional" offering a service where the client relies upon your discretion - and can sue you when that discretion can be questioned. (I'm not trying to talk down to anyone here, but I didn't know squat about PLI until I became a lawyer).
3 - This idea of the professionalization of training is at the heart of what CF is and why it's both enormously successful AND makes Affiliates a good target for the predation of unscrupulous plaintiffs (I won't put it on the lawyers, that's too easy, 'cuz there are no lawyers unless there are plaintiffs willing to claim injury and sue for compensation. Think about that prior to the next lawyer joke).
4 - If the Affiliates and trainers don't see the benefit, that's their choice. Being sued is an "existential threat" - right up until the moment you're sued. Just like getting in a car accident was someone else's problem and you didn't need insurance if you were a "good driver" - and then the states made it mandatory and we all reluctantly pay even though we know it's likely we will be in a scrape here or there.

Hope this adds some perspective.

dale

Comment #79 - Posted by: Dale_Saran at May 6, 2009 7:00 AM

Perspective.

So...one successful lawsuit. Cooch very possibly (likely) gave a deposition for the plaintiff, against the affiliate, trainer, and gym defendants. Cooch could supposedly buy an insurance policy to protect the commune, but doesn't?

@Fers...you are potentially funding the future target of a lawsuit, set up by an inside job from the beginning. Get it yet???

Truth is always stranger than fiction...

IGX

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