The couch thread

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Shafpocalypse Now
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Shafpocalypse Now »

@F has those elements of hippy free love, but with neuroses, that couch just missed out on.

+ Hep and HIV.

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Fish
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Fish »

Ed Zachary wrote:
Stillwater wrote:Some good hate here.

http://slavenation.com/index.php/2009/07/23/cultfit/
=D> =D> =D> =D> =D>
Holy shit. That guy epitomizes @fit-hate.

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Fish
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Fish »

Resident Quack wrote:
This might be the best cult ever.
I can only guess that @Fers get together and compare notes on their favorite cults to come up with this one.
We really need more dumb quotes on here.

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Re: The couch thread

Post by Fish »

I love it when @fitters are too arrogant to understand the flaws in their logic:
I just want to add real quick that since doing bench press, I feel much stronger in my push ups. I never thought I'd say that bench can be beneficial...but I do feel as if I can bust them out quicker and much more efficiently...chest to floor and all. I think that incorporating bench into my workouts has really been great. Even after competing, I think that I'll keep at least DB bench press in my routine.
This is the vicious cycle all @fitters face. They try to abandon conventional exercise because they think they can do better. Then they either (a) try something conventional again and realize it works, or (b) try something conventional again, and amazed by the results, all of a sudden deem it acceptable. But even if they do deem it acceptable, they try to put their own little spin on it and give it an @fit brand, trying to stray from the typical gym-goer stereotype, because gosh-darnet, they are better than everyone else.

Once the @fitter continually realizes the former, they eventually abandon @fit's kooky methodology for something that actually helps them accomplish their goals. Starting Strength is a perfect example of that. It is funny how @fitters try to be totally unorthodox, while they still can't deny the results from simply lifting a heavy barbell through basic compound movements.


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Re: The couch thread

Post by Dano »

Fish wrote:I love it when @fitters are too arrogant to understand the flaws in their logic:

This is the vicious cycle all @fitters face. They try to abandon conventional exercise because they think they can do better. Then they either (a) try something conventional again and realize it works, or (b) try something conventional again, and amazed by the results, all of a sudden deem it acceptable. But even if they do deem it acceptable, they try to put their own little spin on it and give it an @fit brand, trying to stray from the typical gym-goer stereotype, because gosh-darnet, they are better than everyone else.

Once the @fitter continually realizes the former, they eventually abandon @fit's kooky methodology for something that actually helps them accomplish their goals. Starting Strength is a perfect example of that. It is funny how @fitters try to be totally unorthodox, while they still can't deny the results from simply lifting a heavy barbell through basic compound movements.
or C): they try something "conventional" that works and attribute it all to their @fitting. Like, "Wow, after actually focusing on my clean for a year while learning good form from a coach and using low reps in the 80-90% range, I can now lift more than 60kg in the clean!!! And I owe it all to @fit!" :takitass:
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Re: The couch thread

Post by POD »

Dano wrote:
Fish wrote:I love it when @fitters are too arrogant to understand the flaws in their logic:

This is the vicious cycle all @fitters face. They try to abandon conventional exercise because they think they can do better. Then they either (a) try something conventional again and realize it works, or (b) try something conventional again, and amazed by the results, all of a sudden deem it acceptable. But even if they do deem it acceptable, they try to put their own little spin on it and give it an @fit brand, trying to stray from the typical gym-goer stereotype, because gosh-darnet, they are better than everyone else.

Once the @fitter continually realizes the former, they eventually abandon @fit's kooky methodology for something that actually helps them accomplish their goals. Starting Strength is a perfect example of that. It is funny how @fitters try to be totally unorthodox, while they still can't deny the results from simply lifting a heavy barbell through basic compound movements.
or C): they try something "conventional" that works and attribute it all to their @fitting. Like, "Wow, after actually focusing on my clean for a year while learning good form from a coach and using low reps in the 80-90% range, I can now lift more than 60kg in the clean!!! And I owe it all to @fit!" :takitass:
You forgot the @Fit favorite: contributing the success of actual professional athletes to CrossFit. That lets you be both ignorant and arrogant at the same time - perfect for your average Kool Aid swilling CrossFitter.


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Re: The couch thread

Post by Mountebank »

Well, Sage Burgener is on the list. I'd guess Greg skipped it, he wouldn't tolerate bad training or bad trainers, so he's got no worries like the rest of the lot.

I don't have time for this tonight, but I wanted to give y'all some fodda fer tomorra...
(oh the irony) couch speaking on "functionality" into old age

The disjointed and nonsensical (so it encapsulated couch's style well) summary of the video clip.

Questioning the methods, taking a pass at the Kool-Aid? A thread questioning @F's new search for accreditation:
http://board.crossfit.com/showthread.php?t=49598
I don't see the attitude that injury is an acceptable part of training at affiliates, but I do see injuries. All of the injuries I mentioned happened at affiliates that stress proficiency and are staffed by far better trainers than me. The thing that struck me as "off" about the reasoning in coach Glassman's presentation was the idea that we should be finding a justification for these injuries rather than addressing the causes, which may (partly) be the Crossfit method. It's false reasoning to write injuries off as a necessary result of a truly effective training program, just because you keep score in the workouts. This argument was especially strange in the context of the rest of the presentation, which was dedicated to long-term health. The training for seriously competitive sport is intense, it but produces extremely high levels of fitness at the cost of a higher risk of injury, so you don't see people advocating competitive rugby or cage fighting as a path to long-term health. It seems strange that an athlete in search of long-term health would want to pursue a regimen more analogous to competitive athletics than fitness training. There are training methods that stand between high intensity athletic training and doing calf raises with #5 pink dumbbells.
Watch if/when @F gets "accredited" (likely through greasing some palms) that the "certs" double in cost.


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Re: The couch thread

Post by Botototo »

BJ Penn's trainer just remarked on this pre-fight UFC special how BJ was always notorious for his poor conditioning -- nobody says his weakness is his ground game, or his striking, or anything else, it's that his strength and conditioning that wasn't there in the past.

This is pretty funny.

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Fish
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Fish »

Dano wrote:
Fish wrote:I love it when @fitters are too arrogant to understand the flaws in their logic:

This is the vicious cycle all @fitters face. They try to abandon conventional exercise because they think they can do better. Then they either (a) try something conventional again and realize it works, or (b) try something conventional again, and amazed by the results, all of a sudden deem it acceptable. But even if they do deem it acceptable, they try to put their own little spin on it and give it an @fit brand, trying to stray from the typical gym-goer stereotype, because gosh-darnet, they are better than everyone else.

Once the @fitter continually realizes the former, they eventually abandon @fit's kooky methodology for something that actually helps them accomplish their goals. Starting Strength is a perfect example of that. It is funny how @fitters try to be totally unorthodox, while they still can't deny the results from simply lifting a heavy barbell through basic compound movements.
or C): they try something "conventional" that works and attribute it all to their @fitting. Like, "Wow, after actually focusing on my clean for a year while learning good form from a coach and using low reps in the 80-90% range, I can now lift more than 60kg in the clean!!! And I owe it all to @fit!" :takitass:
It's really amazing what specific work in one area can do to help you improve versus doing a bunch of random shit and hoping it will improve, isn't it? :toimonster:

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Fish
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Fish »

Brandon Oto wrote:BJ Penn's trainer just remarked on this pre-fight UFC special how BJ was always notorious for his poor conditioning -- nobody says his weakness is his ground game, or his striking, or anything else, it's that his strength and conditioning that wasn't there in the past.

This is pretty funny.
I would say that is legit. It is going to be hard to fight for 15 or 25 minutes regardless of how good you are if your conditioning is lacking.

Conditioning and GPP sure are not the end-all of training, but they are still a relatively necessary component of a well structured program.


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Re: The couch thread

Post by CultBuster »

This is the vicious cycle all @fitters face. They try to abandon conventional exercise because they think they can do better. Then they either (a) try something conventional again and realize it works, or (b) try something conventional again, and amazed by the results, all of a sudden deem it acceptable. But even if they do deem it acceptable, they try to put their own little spin on it and give it an @fit brand, trying to stray from the typical gym-goer stereotype, because gosh-darnet, they are better than everyone else.
Even worse when their "spin" is the only way to do that exercise. I like when they post videos of Draper or Platz killing squats and critique their form and point out all the mistakes they are making because it isn't Ripp's method from the CFJ. I heard someone aske recently at a race why no one was using POSE. The guy running the race stated simply that "winners win by running fast and that POSE is great for moms and dads that want to finish a 5k for charity"
While doing some heavy deads at the gym recently a queer fitter asked me why I didn't set up with my chest over the bar. He went from 215-230 when he shifted over the bar. I would kill myself with a 230lb deadlift! Idiots! Didn't BJ just give big props to Ross?

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Shafpocalypse Now
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Shafpocalypse Now »

Yeah, the big confused murmur when Tate's presentation on PL form was different than Rip's was amusing.


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Re: The couch thread

Post by TerryB »

The Bastard Son of the Shafman wrote:Yeah, the big confused murmur when Tate's presentation on PL form was different than Rip's was amusing.
Ripp was very polite about it at first ("I don't train powerlifters") but as Tate has gained more visibility in the Cultfit realm, Ripp has made comments on his forum that are more derogatory in nature (paraphrased: "I teach the squat based on anatomical function, Tate doesn't"). That cert money & book sales are pretty good, eh Ripp? Look to see Tate swoop in selling HIS book(lets) and HIS equipment and see how Mark "I'm absolutely right about everything related to barbell training!" Rippetoe reacts.
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WildGorillaMan
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Re: The couch thread

Post by WildGorillaMan »

In case you missed it.
Some have suggested age and weight classes for the Games, or using some form of power calculator to “even out” differences in body types. This is a misunderstanding of real-world fitness. Different size trees don’t grow or fall according to the age or size of the people affected. Snow doesn’t accumulate variously on driveways of different people. In war, soldiers are not divided into weight classes. Walls and hills are not lowered for shorter people, nor are rocks made lighter for taller people. Life demands that you be competent moving both your own body and external objects. To win the CrossFit Games, you must be able to move your own body and specific external objects to the established standards better than everyone else no matter their size, height, or age.

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Re: The couch thread

Post by CultBuster »

With Rip vs. Tate, I would have to lean towards Rip for some of the coaching. Tate is a fntastic athlete who puts up fierce numbers, but Rip has a bit more coaching background and a more academic background. I like both their stuff, but if I were going to give a HS Fottball coach a book it would be Rip's. I still think John Welbourn is the LEAST impressive guy they brought on board. Mike Burgener and Jeff Martone are impressive guys and I can see why couch would need people like that, Welbourne is still a mystery.

This picture always leads me to the question of "what is your point?" you suck at both of them!"
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Gin Master »

More irritation for Couch. Greg's Performance Menu and the associated people (Robb Wolf, etc.) are a pain in Couch's ass, but neither will cut the other one loose.

Re: How do you program a good metcon?

http://www.cathletics.com/forum/showthread.php?t=4528
It is too bad that the supposed "genius" of CF programming is too complicated to share with the unwashed masses...

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Re: The couch thread

Post by T200 »

A "relatively" elite faggot says:
When is enough enough?
As in, I am now happy with almost every aspect of my fitness. I'm strong enough, fast enough, and fit enough. I'm not elite in terms of Crossfitters, but I am elite compared to the general populace.

In terms of longevity, I think it's healthier (and a heck of a lot more fun) to reach good levels of fitness, then just maintain it. You have a good level of muscle, but don't strain your digestive and other systems by trying to pack on too much. You don't strain your nervous system with insane workloads. You don't strain your joints trying to force your tendons and ligaments to keep up with the newfound strength of your muscles.

You just cruise along, in my case with four workouts per week (still experimenting with this) and devote other time to play. It's like, I've done my work getting here, now I get to focus my energies on other parts of my life. Career, family, and such.

Anyone else in the same boat? If so, what were your levels of fitness when you decided you were satisfied with where you are?

A few of my numbers are: 2 x bodyweight deadlift, 1 minute 4 secs 400 m, 4:08 Fran, 24 round Cindy. One thing I never got (and only tried a couple of times) was a snatch, a good overhead squat I think for both because I never invested time in the technique and shoulder flexibility) and a muscle up.

Male 30 yo 100 kg give or take, and 6 feet.
And LOL at this Canadian fucktard response:
Re: When is enough enough?

I've often wondered the same thing.

When do I quit pushing myself? 400# squat? 600# deadlift? 400# Bench Press? 5 min mile? 100 pushups?

There are a ton of others as well.

Obviously I'm not at that point yet, but eventually, be it 5 years from now, there will come a point where I have reached all the goals I set.

And I'll be 25 years old and wondering what the hell to do next.
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WildGorillaMan
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Re: The couch thread

Post by WildGorillaMan »

When do I quit pushing myself?

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next question?
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T200
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Re: The couch thread

Post by T200 »

An @Fit ELITE GARAGE GYM experience:
It's Crossfit (Redacted). The "owner" (do people own affiliates?) is also named Dan. I was first surprised because he did not have us fill out any papers nor did he ask any questions about our health or anything. He just said, "For warm-up we're going to do two rounds of running 400 meters..." at which point I raised my hand and said, "I am not supposed to run because of my knees. Do you mind if I walk quickly?" He looked like I'd just asked if I could land a flying saucer in his yard and was silent for a moment before he said, "power walk?" I said yes, even though I'm not exactly sure what power walking is. But it sounded better than running. He said, "Then we'll do 10 push-ups and 15 squats. Go!" I went, and after walking quickly I went to do my push-ups on his wall. He was taken aback by this also.

I should pause at this point to say that I had probably made an unwise decision by spending an hour (or more) cleaning tobacco tar from the inside of the used car we bought in the 90+ degree heat and near 100% humidity in the sun. (Well over 100 degrees in the car.) I was literally dripping like a faucet before we even went to exercise. Not the best decision ever. But the car got clean!

Anyway, he took us into his garage to show us the proper way to do several exercises. The first was the squat, and he began by saying the bend of the hips should fall below the bend of the knees, and showing us how it is done. We all did our best, but I was in extreme pain (muscle) quite a while before my hips got that low. The folks in UT had said, "Just go as low as you can. People who are not in very good shape don't usually go very far down, but after a while you'll get there." This guy just said, "No. That's not it. You have to go down more." So we all tried. Then he told us to hold it while he came around to inspect us. (there was another woman there as well.) Staying like that in the sun and heat made me feel like I was about to faint, but when I stood up he told me to go back down, so I did. (I think he might be a drill sergeant in his other life.) I did not pass inspection, but he finally gave up on getting me down far enough and went on to some other things that were basically squats while holding a PVC pipe. They would be really great exercises under normal conditions, (no heat exhaustion) and if I had been allowed to just go how far I could without being in tons of pain. Any requests for a repeat of explanations were completely ignored. As it was, while holding one of these positions I started to faint (room going black) so I stood up and went quickly to sit on his step. He stopped talking and stared at me. Then asked if I was ok. I said "Just trying not to faint." He looked disgusted and turned around to continue with the others.

About this time Josh arrived (her son) and watched for a minute, then picked up a PVC pipe and started to join in, when the guy said, "You can't come in in the middle." (This was his only form of greeting and the only thing he said to Josh the entire time. Not the best social skills-- but that's another matter.) I stood up again to try to join in the next squat but almost passed out again just from standing, so I sat back down. When they had finished seeing how to do the squats, he sent them out to do some rounds of something. He made a point of saying the other three would do the rounds. I did not try to participate. While they ran I explained briefly that I had just spent an hour cleaning a car in this heat. He responded: "Cross fit is for--" he stopped himself. "Well, technically it's for everyone. But I have 17 athletes I work with here. We have a schedule and we can't wait around for someone like you." I stared at him. "Do you understand?" I said "yes." He said, "Maybe if you go home and get into shape, maybe you could come back and join us, but if you can't even get through this-- well." He walked off.

When he came near me later I tried again to explain that I was really just having problems with the heat, but he walked away. It was really like I was something disgusting he did not know how to deal with. Peter and Naomi (her other kids) had joined in the warm-ups off to the side, but had then sat down to play cards for the rest of the time. Before we left he said, "And I can't babysit your kids while you exercise." ???? I had not asked, expected or thought he might! I had asked on the phone before coming if it was ok for them to come along. He explained that he was not Crossfit Kids, but they could watch from the side and try some of the easier things on their own if they liked. Then he said again, "Maybe if you work out at home or even come to boot camp, you might be able to join us eventually. But I work with athletes." Then he turned his back and walked away. Even when we called out, "Thank you!" before getting in the car, he did not respond. He talked and smiled with the other lady, but made it very clear I was not welcome.
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Gin Master »

CultBuster wrote:I still think John Welbourn is the LEAST impressive guy they brought on board. Mike Burgener and Jeff Martone are impressive guys and I can see why couch would need people like that, Welbourne is still a mystery.
Their thinking (IMO) is that:

1. Welbourn is the only ex-pro athlete from a mainstream sport (who had a good career) to hoist a pitcher of kool-aid.

2. He's big and strong, which is a novelty in @F.

3. He was busted for steroids. The community collectively decries this as cheating, but Couch secretly likes this as it gives @F some cred by suggesting it's juice-worthy.

4. He has a degree from Berkley, which means he has more formal education than most in HQ. They hope this doesn't embarrass himself every time he talks.

5. He is a big potential money-maker. If @F gets recognized in a real sport, it makes @FFB legit, which means @F is legit, which means @F can make even more money.

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Kazuya Mishima
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Kazuya Mishima »

Oh, fucking hell...

Shari has become a figure competitor.

I didn't know you could stack crazy on top of crazy.

http://sharikeener.blogspot.com/

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T200
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Re: The couch thread

Post by T200 »

Kazuya Mishima wrote: I didn't know you could stack crazy on top of crazy.
That's the best way to deal with it IMO.

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Gin Master
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Gin Master »

From Dallas @F, one of the dumbest offerings ever:
For time:
95 pound Thruster, 100 reps

At the start of every minute, you must complete 5 burpees.

Post time to comments.

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Kraj
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Kraj »

Kazuya Mishima wrote:Oh, fucking hell...

Shari has become a figure competitor.

I didn't know you could stack crazy on top of crazy.

http://sharikeener.blogspot.com/

"I imagined myself holding something tasty in my hands, how it felt as it touched my lips and tongue...the pleasure Id feel as it slid down my throat."


She's lonelier than I thought.
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Re: The couch thread

Post by CultBuster »

Steve Liberati
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--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Quote:
Originally Posted by Garrett Smith
It is too bad that the supposed "genius" of CF programming is too complicated to share with the unwashed masses...


wow Garrett, I think you've made your dislike of CrossFit abundantly clear by now. I don't visit the PMenu as much as I like anymore (just not enough hrs in the day!), but everytime I visit the boards...its the same ol' shit hearing you bag CrossFit or make snide remarks about its trainers or programming. Wasn't it just a few months ago that you were working on getting CF affiliated? Guess that didn't work out so well, so now you have an axe to grind and make every opportunity you get on the board or in an article to take a stab at CF.

If its not your thing, why can't you just leave it at that?
__________________
Nice little spat going. How many douche's are going to admit that not only do they not do main page wods, but that the overall programming is fucktarded!?

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