I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

milosz · Post by **milosz** » Sat Sep 05, 2015 4:18 am

Holy shit, I had no idea that Rocky of I & II was retarded. I feel like this goes unremarked upon in the overall hagiography of the movies.

TomFurman · Post by **TomFurman** » Sat Sep 05, 2015 8:38 pm

hag·i·og·ra·phy
ˌhaɡēˈäɡrəfē,ˌhāɡē-/
noun
the writing of the lives of saints.
derogatory
adulatory writing about another person.
biography that idealizes its subject.
plural noun: hagiographies

I liked them.

nafod · Post by **nafod** » Sun Sep 06, 2015 1:50 pm

milosz wrote:Holy shit, I had no idea that Rocky of I & II was retarded.

They are where the phrase "beat some sense into him" came from.

Shapecharge · Post by **Shapecharge** » Sun Sep 06, 2015 3:49 pm

You best check yo'self Milsovich. During their time they were great and still are, especially the first one. Rocky won three Oscars including best picture and was the highest grossing movie for '76 but it appears your superior intellect has rendered you incapable of seeing what an absolutely wonderful movie Rocky is and all the rest of us must just be idiots. I've watched them all...how can you not...but the first one will always be a treasured favorite and you sir may go fuck yourself.

Kazuya Mishima · Post by **Kazuya Mishima** » Sun Sep 06, 2015 9:52 pm

First of all, don't ever refer to the first movie in a series as "1". The first Rocky movie is 'Rocky', not 'Rocky 1'. So, OP has failed by trying to take a shit on two of American sports cinemas most fabled offerings, but has made the mouth breathing retard faux pas of adding the numeral 1 to the opening installment. I could go on forever...this is almost as annoying as people who pluralize shit that shouldn't be pluralized..."Hey, ya'll...I'm going to Wal-Marts and then I'm going to stop by Krogers".

Getting past that, the first two installments are awesome. Rocky III is when things started to get hairy, but that one is still compulsory viewing for all American males, IMO. Rocky IV was a cash grab shit show of epic proportions, but it's still worth a viewing for the quotable portions and it's a study on how 1980s American cinema really set the stage for the dogshit we have today. Rocky V went full on retard, but again, it's still worth a viewing so that one can marvel at the horribly bad MC Hammer soundtrack tunes, get a good look at Tommy Morrison before he was taken down by Ray Mercer and AIDS, and a young Sage Stallone who turned in a pretty decent performance for a kid who only got the job because his old man was the producer and titular character. Too bad he later became "an hero".

Rocky Balboa was the nonsensical final installment. It's just bad and doesn't make a lot of sense, but it tugs at the heart strings of anyone who is a fan of the series.

They are supposedly making another movie called 'Creed' that resurrects the Rocky character in a supporting role. I won't be watching it unless the finale involves that nigger getting shot again like he did in 'Fruitvale Station'.

To put a bow on this...Rocky and Rocky II are awesome...to say otherwise is to forfeit your credibility as a male human being.

Bobby · Post by **Bobby** » Sun Sep 06, 2015 9:58 pm

Kazuya Mishima wrote:First of all, don't ever refer to the first movie in a series as "1". The first Rocky movie is 'Rocky', not 'Rocky 1'. So, OP has failed by trying to take a shit on two of American sports cinemas most fabled offerings, but has made the mouth breathing retard faux pas of adding the numeral 1 to the opening installment. I could go on forever...this is almost as annoying as people who pluralize shit that shouldn't be pluralized..."Hey, ya'll...I'm going to Wal-Marts and then I'm going to stop by Krogers".

Getting past that, the first two installments are awesome. Rocky III is when things started to get hairy, but that one is still compulsory viewing for all American males, IMO. Rocky IV was a cash grab shit show of epic proportions, but it's still worth a viewing for the quotable portions and it's a study on how 1980s American cinema really set the stage for the dogshit we have today. Rocky V went full on retard, but again, it's still worth a viewing so that one can marvel at the horribly bad MC Hammer soundtrack tunes, get a good look at Tommy Morrison before he was taken down by Ray Mercer and AIDS, and a young Sage Stallone who turned in a pretty decent performance for a kid who only got the job because his old man was the producer and titular character. Too bad he later became "an hero".

Rocky Balboa was the nonsensical final installment. It's just bad and doesn't make a lot of sense, but it tugs at the heart strings of anyone who is a fan of the series.

You could use more or less the same text about "First blood" (noticed that I didn`t write Rambo 1?).

They are supposedly making another movie called 'Creed' that resurrects the Rocky character in a supporting role. I won't be watching it unless the finale involves that nigger getting shot again like he did in 'Fruitvale Station'.

To put a bow on this...Rocky and Rocky II are awesome...to say otherwise is to forfeit your credibility as a male human being.

Bobby · Post by **Bobby** » Sun Sep 06, 2015 10:01 pm

Forgot to write:you could use more or less the same text about "First blood" (noticed that I didn`t call it Rambo 1?).

Turdacious · Post by **Turdacious** » Mon Sep 07, 2015 2:03 am

This scene is what the movie is about.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SDJj9yyqds[/youtube]
The series went downhill without Meredith.

milosz · Post by **milosz** » Mon Sep 07, 2015 2:10 am

I didn't say the movies weren't good (I won't venture all the way to great), I was genuinely surprised that Rocky appears to be mentally challenged.

syaigh · Post by **syaigh** » Mon Sep 07, 2015 2:46 am

He's not retarded. He's an average Merican. Seriously. He isn't very eloquent, but eloquence is like putting lipstick on a pig for most people. I've listened to many eloquent ferreners who were about as sharp as a meatloaf.

SubClaw · Post by **SubClaw** » Mon Sep 07, 2015 4:48 am

Kazuya Mishima wrote:Getting past that, the first two installments are awesome. Rocky III is when things started to get hairy, but that one is still compulsory viewing for all American males

Is it because he spends all three movies trying to punch black people?

nafod · Post by **nafod** » Mon Sep 07, 2015 12:47 pm

milosz wrote:I didn't say the movies weren't good (I won't venture all the way to great), I was genuinely surprised that Rocky appears to be mentally challenged.

I got it.

I pity the fools who didn't.

Protobuilder · Post by **Protobuilder** » Tue Sep 08, 2015 2:30 pm

When Trump is deciding if an illegal should be deported or not, they should simply hook them up to a HRM and play part of the soundtrack. If nothing happens, ship their ass out of the country because they obviously aren't American enough to remain. Rocky is, hands down, one of the greatest sports movies ever made.

Honestly, I believe that I actually started with IV then went to III then went back to experience the full greatness of the series. Honestly, I can't imagine how fantastic it would have been to have seen them in the original order and have been 7 or 8 when Rocky finally beat Apollo. Would that have been the greatest movie moment of my life?

That being said, if you were flipping through TV this evening and a Rocky were just starting, would you watch the entire thing, assuming you knew where your remote control was and you weren't drunk enough that you didn't know how to use it? Probably not. Same for Rocky II. However, if Rocky III were on you would have a nice opening, followed by Hulk followed by Mr T followed by Mickey's dying (did you see that coming?) followed by Apollo and Rocky wearing short shorts and frolicking in the surf. Oh my. This is ALL BEFORE THE REAL FIGHT EVEN STARTS. Does any other movie do this? This is not a great movie but it's probably the most watchable of the bunch.

Even then, I prefer Rocky IV which should be in a time capsule sent to space to show the perfect example of 1980s cinema and also to show aliens not to fuck with us.

Now, if anybody mentions what happens after Rocky IV, fuck them because nothing should have happened after that movie although the finale was not bad because Adrian finally died.

IGX

I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time

Re: I'm watching Rocky I and II for the first time