The couch thread

[MonkeyJesus]

The joys of meditating with a timer and fleeting thoughts

[nafod]

Although, in terms of mental toughness, nothing beats "holding the balloon" for time.

What's in the balloon? Are you holding it down or holding it up?

[newguy]

delete post

[newguy]

Although, in terms of mental toughness, nothing beats "holding the balloon" for time.

What's in the balloon? Are you holding it down or holding it up?

As far as I can tell, my chi is supposed to be in the balloon. Once my awareness and energy increase, I am will be able to make the balloon heavier with my mind by filling it with mental water.

Then, after a few years of training, I will be able to make the balloon expand against my arms, which is a step up from filling it with mental water.

I highly suggest The Way of Energy. It is a great book, and despite my seemingly flippant attitude, I have been getting a lot out of my standing, but that is a different thread.

[Fat Cat]

Are you fucking nuts?

[The Real Rant]

I'm fucking IP banned from the Crossfit forum, therefore I cannot access any "extras" on it.

Me too but I have about 16 other IPs I could go through if I so desired. In light of this it is I that has banned them although I am getting a shit load of direct feeds from their message boards lately.

[Anon]

Notice how the knees track over the feet:

http://www.crossfit.com/mt-archive2/SDFranThruster.html

[Ripe Turd]

What I'm noticing is the rack...

[Anon]

Oh yea that too...get them elbows up girlfriend!

[The Real Rant]

Notice how the knees track over the feet:

http://www.crossfit.com/mt-archive2/SDFranThruster.html

Uh...what knees? Oh...I see but I'm much more interested in the the rack in the rack.

[MonkeyJesus]

Yeah, nice tits but WTF is she trying to do? FSQ?

[nafod]

Probably thrusters

[Holland Oates]

I love the pissed off look the ugly chick behind her is giving the guy next her.

[Blaidd Drwg]

Scroll right for the punchline.

[Sua Sponte]

This is interesting. The USMC is changing their PT requirements

http://www.marinecorpstimes.com/news/20 ... s_042008w/

The all-new CFT

The test is separated into three parts:

* The 880-yard sprint. Designed to simulate “movement to contact,” Marines will be timed running in a straight line. How difficult is it? Think of it as a half-mile run. To put it into Olympic terms, that’s roughly two laps around a standard outdoor track, 800 meters. World records in the 800-meter sprint come in at less than two minutes for men and women.

* The “ammo can lift.” Marines will lift a 30-pound ammunition box from a starting position of chest level to above the head with both arms extended. Need a weight comparison? A Modular Tactical Vest, loaded with front, back and side plates, weighs about 25 pounds. Marines will repeat the lift for a set time period, likely two minutes. Scores are based on the number of lifts performed in that set time period, but the scoring system is not yet approved.

* The “maneuver under fire” drill. The most comprehensive section of the CFT will be a four-part obstacle course that will include sprinting, throwing a grenade, running with two ammo cans and moving a mock casualty.

An 880-yard straight line sprint is simulating a movement to contact? Maybe if you're running away. Not something the United States Marine is famous for.

And which combat skill is being tested by lifting an ammo can over your head as many times as possible in two minutes? The Army tests the same thing using push-ups but is reportedly a bunch of pussies. Put 30lbs in an ammo can and press it and now it's somehow functional and combat related. You betcha. I guess because it's in an ammo can.

And Crossfit equals mental toughness for combat?

Of course, in my day we didn't do the highly combat focused tasks like reps of the clean and jerk ala Crossfit. No, not for us. For us it was mamma's boy forced marches until your feet bled so badly they stuck to your socks, or timed negotiation of obstacle and assault courses, or sitting in the rain in ambush position for 2 or 3 days and being expected to react perfectly when the target moved across the kill zone, then move for days on end under load to the extraction point, multi-day evasion and escape exercises covering tens of miles with 100lbs worth of equipment but without food, close quarters battles drills repeated so often that you couldn't even stop dreaming about them yet were damn sure you could trust the guy to your left and right to put multiple live rounds inches from your head but dead nuts on target, patrolling without sleep for days, land navigation exercises under load that were tens of miles in the dessert and several ridge lines between points in the mountains. You know, non-combat related pussy stuff like that.

Puking? Sure, when we did buddy carries up and down hills until your buddy's weight made your legs crumble. Until it was deeply instilled in us that, no, we will not ever leave a fallen comrade. Or 3-5 second rushes, high crawls and low crawls, assaulting a trench line or bunker complex until our elbows and knees were raw and we were vomiting as the sun fell, so indicating we could then begin the night drills of the assault.

Little did those dull witted, candy-assed platoon sergeants with three tours with Ranger companies in Vietnam know that that sort of physical and mental toughness could be had by your average soccer Mom doing 20 minutes of box jumps and medicinal ball throws a few days a week before sitting in front of a computer the rest of the day.

I'm not Crossfit hater and I do think Crossfit has value for a Soldier or Marine but it is not all things to a combat infantryman. This drivel about Crossfit = physical and mental combat fitness in and of itself has grown a bit old. You think Crossfit provides the necessary mental and physical toughness needed for combat? Well, you and the rest of the Crossfit living room tough guys can just go the fuck on and ruck the fuck up, Gwyneth, because there's a shooting war going on and you internet bad asses can go on over there show me how many thrusters it takes to watch your buddy's brains dump out the back side of his skull and drive on anyway.

Statistically, 1 guy in 20 'made it' in a Ranger Bn. You'll know you have what it takes when you are that one guy. Until then, take that jump rope cert and tell yourself anything you need to hear.

[___________]

An 880-yard straight line sprint is simulating a movement to contact? Maybe if you're running away. Not something the United States Marine is famous for.

And which combat skill is being tested by lifting an ammo can over your head as many times as possible in two minutes? The Army tests the same thing using push-ups but is reportedly a bunch of pussies. Put 30lbs in an ammo can and press it and now it's somehow functional and combat related. You betcha. I guess because it's in an ammo can.

And Crossfit equals mental toughness for combat?

Of course, in my day we didn't do the highly combat focused tasks like reps of the clean and jerk ala Crossfit. No, not for us. For us it was mamma's boy forced marches until your feet bled so badly they stuck to your socks, or timed negotiation of obstacle and assault courses, or sitting in the rain in ambush position for 2 or 3 days and being expected to react perfectly when the target moved across the kill zone, then move for days on end under load to the extraction point, multi-day evasion and escape exercises covering tens of miles with 100lbs worth of equipment but without food, close quarters battles drills repeated so often that you couldn't even stop dreaming about them yet were damn sure you could trust the guy to your left and right to put multiple live rounds inches from your head but dead nuts on target, patrolling without sleep for days, land navigation exercises under load that were tens of miles in the dessert and several ridge lines between points in the mountains. You know, non-combat related pussy stuff like that.

Puking? Sure, when we did buddy carries up and down hills until your buddy's weight made your legs crumble. Until it was deeply instilled in us that, no, we will not ever leave a fallen comrade. Or 3-5 second rushes, high crawls and low crawls, assaulting a trench line or bunker complex until our elbows and knees were raw and we were vomiting as the sun fell, so indicating we could then begin the night drills of the assault.

Little did those dull witted, candy-assed platoon sergeants with three tours with Ranger companies in Vietnam know that that sort of physical and mental toughness could be had by your average soccer Mom doing 20 minutes of box jumps and medicinal ball throws a few days a week before sitting in front of a computer the rest of the day.

I'm not Crossfit hater and I do think Crossfit has value for a Soldier or Marine but it is not all things to a combat infantryman. This drivel about Crossfit = physical and mental combat fitness in and of itself has grown a bit old. You think Crossfit provides the necessary mental and physical toughness needed for combat? Well, you and the rest of the Crossfit living room tough guys can just go the fuck on and ruck the fuck up, Gwyneth, because there's a shooting war going on and you internet bad asses can show me how many thrusters it takes to watch your buddy's brains dump out the back side of his skull and drive on anyway.

Statistically, 1 guy in 20 'made it' in a Ranger Bn. You'll know you have what it takes when you are that one guy. Until then, take that jump rope cert and tell yourself anything you need to hear.

This is a great post.
Bump.

[Anon]

Scroll right for the punchline.

A true crossfit freak. I question the functionality of the ear plates/disks.

[___________]

More aerodynamic.
Better Fran time, that's obviously.

[steelydan]

Well, at least he can be sure he'll never work a soul-sucking nine to five cubicle job in corporate America.

[___________]

Well, at least he can be sure he'll never work a soul-sucking nine to five cubicle job in corporate America.

What does a free spirit like that do for a living anyfuckingwho?

[Crust Bucket]

What does a free spirit like that do for a living anyfuckingwho?

Work at the circus.

[___________]

What does a free spirit like that do for a living anyfuckingwho?

Work at the circus.

Do they do muscle ups & shovel elephant shit for time?

[Crust Bucket]

Do they do muscle ups & shovel elephant shit for time?

Does Cooch have a limp and a big belly?

[___________]

Do they do muscle ups & shovel elephant shit for time?

Does Cooch have a limp dick and a big belly?

Fixed.
Wasn't that what Couch got so pissed off at Hillis for anyhow?

[Batboy2/75]

This is interesting. The USMC is changing their PT requirements

http://www.marinecorpstimes.com/news/20 ... s_042008w/

The all-new CFT

The test is separated into three parts:

* The 880-yard sprint. Designed to simulate “movement to contact,” Marines will be timed running in a straight line. How difficult is it? Think of it as a half-mile run. To put it into Olympic terms, that’s roughly two laps around a standard outdoor track, 800 meters. World records in the 800-meter sprint come in at less than two minutes for men and women.

* The “ammo can lift.” Marines will lift a 30-pound ammunition box from a starting position of chest level to above the head with both arms extended. Need a weight comparison? A Modular Tactical Vest, loaded with front, back and side plates, weighs about 25 pounds. Marines will repeat the lift for a set time period, likely two minutes. Scores are based on the number of lifts performed in that set time period, but the scoring system is not yet approved.

* The “maneuver under fire” drill. The most comprehensive section of the CFT will be a four-part obstacle course that will include sprinting, throwing a grenade, running with two ammo cans and moving a mock casualty.

An 880-yard straight line sprint is simulating a movement to contact? Maybe if you're running away. Not something the United States Marine is famous for.

And which combat skill is being tested by lifting an ammo can over your head as many times as possible in two minutes? The Army tests the same thing using push-ups but is reportedly a bunch of pussies. Put 30lbs in an ammo can and press it and now it's somehow functional and combat related. You betcha. I guess because it's in an ammo can.

And Crossfit equals mental toughness for combat?

Of course, in my day we didn't do the highly combat focused tasks like reps of the clean and jerk ala Crossfit. No, not for us. For us it was mamma's boy forced marches until your feet bled so badly they stuck to your socks, or timed negotiation of obstacle and assault courses, or sitting in the rain in ambush position for 2 or 3 days and being expected to react perfectly when the target moved across the kill zone, then move for days on end under load to the extraction point, multi-day evasion and escape exercises covering tens of miles with 100lbs worth of equipment but without food, close quarters battles drills repeated so often that you couldn't even stop dreaming about them yet were damn sure you could trust the guy to your left and right to put multiple live rounds inches from your head but dead nuts on target, patrolling without sleep for days, land navigation exercises under load that were tens of miles in the dessert and several ridge lines between points in the mountains. You know, non-combat related pussy stuff like that.

Puking? Sure, when we did buddy carries up and down hills until your buddy's weight made your legs crumble. Until it was deeply instilled in us that, no, we will not ever leave a fallen comrade. Or 3-5 second rushes, high crawls and low crawls, assaulting a trench line or bunker complex until our elbows and knees were raw and we were vomiting as the sun fell, so indicating we could then begin the night drills of the assault.

Little did those dull witted, candy-assed platoon sergeants with three tours with Ranger companies in Vietnam know that that sort of physical and mental toughness could be had by your average soccer Mom doing 20 minutes of box jumps and medicinal ball throws a few days a week before sitting in front of a computer the rest of the day.

I'm not Crossfit hater and I do think Crossfit has value for a Soldier or Marine but it is not all things to a combat infantryman. This drivel about Crossfit = physical and mental combat fitness in and of itself has grown a bit old. You think Crossfit provides the necessary mental and physical toughness needed for combat? Well, you and the rest of the Crossfit living room tough guys can just go the fuck on and ruck the fuck up, Gwyneth, because there's a shooting war going on and you internet bad asses can go on over there show me how many thrusters it takes to watch your buddy's brains dump out the back side of his skull and drive on anyway.

Statistically, 1 guy in 20 'made it' in a Ranger Bn. You'll know you have what it takes when you are that one guy. Until then, take that jump rope cert and tell yourself anything you need to hear.

Damn, you made me home sick!