The couch thread

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GoDogGo!
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Re: The couch thread

Post by GoDogGo! »

WildGorillaMan wrote: This is a lot like how geocentricism eventually died, and heliocentrism became accepted:the observable evidence obviously completely disproved the official theory (sun revolves around the earth/@fit builds elite fitness, take your pick), so those the church/koolaid drinkers had to come up with increasingly more bizarre mental gymnastics (epicycles/modal domains, or whatever), building a mountain of bullshit one specious "proof" at a time, until eventually the whole construct collapses under it's own weight of self-serving absurdity, and everyone has to admit that Coppernicus/IGx was right all along.
But not before a few brave souls have been forced to recant before Pope Couchus I and his Inquisition of Test-enhanced bitches.

There is a legend that after recanting some are heard to murmur "E pur si fellatio" ("And yet it sucks.")
The flesh is weak, and the smell of pussy is strong like a muthafucka.

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Turdacious
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Turdacious »

Copernicus wasn't right, Kepler was.
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Blaidd Drwg
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Blaidd Drwg »

The Unflushable DEATHTURD wrote:Copernicus wasn't right, Kepler was.
Are you taking up Jack's mantle of IGX insufferable boor?
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Fish
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Fish »

Gin Master wrote:
Alfred_E._Neuman wrote:
Gin Master wrote:
Kam wrote...

June 20, 2009 2:32 PM

Reputation (for individuals within) (Coach if you're reading this I know you give the two fingered salute to the institution ;)), Integrity and for one of a better word - Virtuosity is a cornerstone of the crossfit microcosm. Taking a pragmatic approach - An excellent point was raised on the mainpage discussion log: We are data points. When you have a sample size there is always a distribution within the population - Lets just hope there isnt too fat a tail.

- Kam
My head asplode.

That "paragraph" is like sitting in on the worst corporate meeting in history. You'd fill up your Buzzword Bingo card in about a second. Image
I'm still not sure what it even says. But your smiley is righteous. It puts old rolly eyes to shame.
I am just glad I am not the only one that could not understand that post.

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POD
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Re: The couch thread

Post by POD »

Good ole' affiliate blog. It just never stops coming.

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Kraj
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Kraj »

Patrick Donnelly wrote:Good ole' affiliate blog. It just never stops coming.

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We're living in the end times.
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___________
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Re: The couch thread

Post by ___________ »

Oh fucking seriously.

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Trebuchet
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Trebuchet »

Stigmata. Crucify him.
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Sassenach
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Sassenach »

Really? Really?
Kazuya Mishima wrote:they can pry the bacon from my cold dead hand.


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Re: The couch thread

Post by ___________ »

*****
Last edited by ___________ on Thu Dec 05, 2013 10:07 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Shafpocalypse Now
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Shafpocalypse Now »

The hand thing is fucking retarded. I bet it's because they tape the chin bars up.

Seriously. You can't train with fucked up, tore up hands, and all that blood is not on whatever equipment they used. And probably not washed off. In any other situation with blood discipline that would be considered a biohazard.

The puking thing: It's so cute that guy looks normal except for those African ear plugs. He's now unique and special because of a low grade body mod.

I've torn my hands in competition, but almost never in training, and it's always been with supramaximal rack pulls or something or farmers walks.

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Trebuchet
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Trebuchet »

The Bastard Son of the Shafman wrote:The puking thing: It's so cute
Puking is a sign of failure. Real champion athletes don't puke - they collapse, but not puke. If you puke you are weak. Cardinal sign of a loose sphincter...and bulimia nervosa.
"My resting heart rate is 39 when I don't read posts on the bad forum" - Marty


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Re: The couch thread

Post by TerryB »

The Bastard Son of the Shafman wrote:The hand thing is fucking retarded. I bet it's because they tape the chin bars up.

Seriously. You can't train with fucked up, tore up hands, and all that blood is not on whatever equipment they used. And probably not washed off. In any other situation with blood discipline that would be considered a biohazard.

The puking thing: It's so cute that guy looks normal except for those African ear plugs. He's now unique and special because of a low grade body mod.

I've torn my hands in competition, but almost never in training, and it's always been with supramaximal rack pulls or something or farmers walks.
And, again, the only people that can afford to walk around with shredded hands are those faggots who don't need them. Kinda hard to patrol, load magazines, sling gear, haul sandbags, with your hands a painful, bloody, infected mess.

Real smart 'program' that puts everyone out of commission or sends them to sick call for bandages and antiseptic.
"Know that! & Know it deep you fucking loser!"

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Gin Master
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Gin Master »

This guy starts to make sense then goes down the tubes.
The pics are amusing, however, nothing I would remotely want on a blog site, mine or another CrossFitters. People have enough trepidation about CrossFit. Imagine the person who has been wanting to try CF, gets the courage up to go to the blog to check out times, dates, fees, etc., and then sees that! That's one customer that's gonna stay away and stick with a "safer" back & bi's split followed by 45 minutes of treadmill time.

CrossFit is a tremendous program, however, it does have some image problems, preconceived notions, and many detractors out there offering up false info in an effort to save their marginal at best fitness programs. We shouldn't be adding to the fire. Over the top pix of CrossFit madness and glorified stories of major butt kickings and near or full-blown Rhabdo cases don't need to make the front page. We know it's out there, but let's not use it as a selling point.
...
Comment #8 - Posted by: Ian Carver at June 23, 2009 10:32 PM
Then the evangelicals come out. Spider Dick would be proud.
I agree with Ian, very much so. These photos on your blogs just entertain the folks who thing it's cool and turn of most of the people who need to have their life saved by Crossfit.
Jen
Comment #10 - Posted by: jen at June 24, 2009 2:23 AM

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mr. snrub
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Re: The couch thread

Post by mr. snrub »

Why are the women the fuck-crazy ones?

I'm serious.

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WildGorillaMan
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Re: The couch thread

Post by WildGorillaMan »

mr. snrub wrote:Why are the women the fuck-crazy ones?

I'm serious.
Are you kidding? They're @fit's biggest selling point!
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WildGorillaMan
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Re: The couch thread

Post by WildGorillaMan »

Speaking of virtuosity, here's some great ass-to-grass squatting from @fitters. or not.

http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970c-500wi


http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970b-500wi

http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970b-500wi

http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970b-500wi

http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970c-500wi

oh the humanity:

http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970c-500wi


I think we've seen enough.

I also think it's safe to say that none of these nimrods even knows what a full squat looks like, let alone can peform one. How do I know that? Because if they could, they would have had their picture taken doing it!
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You'll Hurt Your Back

basically I'm Raoul Duke trying to fit into a Philip K. Dick movie remake.

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Kraj
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Kraj »

mr. snrub wrote:Why are the women the fuck-crazy ones?
Because they're women.
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Fish
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Fish »

WildGorillaMan wrote:Speaking of virtuosity, here's some great ass-to-grass squatting from @fitters. or not.

http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970c-500wi


http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970b-500wi

http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970b-500wi

http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970b-500wi

http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970c-500wi

oh the humanity:

http://crossfitfirebase.typepad.com/.a/ ... 970c-500wi


I think we've seen enough.

I also think it's safe to say that none of these nimrods even knows what a full squat looks like, let alone can peform one. How do I know that? Because if they could, they would have had their picture taken doing it!
Hmm, none of them are in racks either and they are using bumper plates to make it look like there is a shit ton more weight than there really is on the bar.

Those guys are fucking badass.

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Fish
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Fish »

Dumb shit quote of the day:
Marcel Zwinger wrote:If curls worked, then all guys would have big guns...
If couchfit worked, then all the guys would be elite athletes.


I am getting my skills up so I can help edit the "Stupid Quotes" section in the Limbaugh Letter.

EDIT: I forgot to mention the context of what that comment was from: http://www.board.crossfit.com/showthread.php?t=33588. These guys are totally right, they know much more than actual bodybuilders, merely from speculation of what they think should work.
Last edited by Fish on Wed Jun 24, 2009 7:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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POD
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Re: The couch thread

Post by POD »

Fish wrote:Dumb shit quote of the day:
Marcel Zwinger wrote:If curls worked, then all guys would have big guns...
If couchfit worked, then all the guys would be elite athletes.
=D> =D> =D>

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Kazuya Mishima
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Kazuya Mishima »

Note the faux-hawk...now with highlights.
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Last edited by Kazuya Mishima on Wed Jun 24, 2009 8:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Fat Cat
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Fat Cat »

Now with added fail.
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Kazuya Mishima
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Kazuya Mishima »

Now with bikini pullups.


Mountebank
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Mountebank »

From the "Are you fucking kidding me, are you that stupid?" files...
I don't know about anyone else but I loved doing front squats yesterday. First time doing them heavy and felt great the whole time. I am feeling it in my core today.

I had a hemilamenectomy a few years back (essentially I am missing part of several of my vertebrae) and have found back squats feel really odd, not in a good way. It almost feels like my spine is unstable and could snap at any minute. Feels fine on deadlifts and OH squats. I am thinking for all of the future heavy back squat lifts I will do front squats or OH squats instead. Thoughts?
Um, load up the back squat bar really heavy to test your hunch??? <<<<q Idiot.

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