I did not know that! Does she have an evil universe twin goatee?Shafpocalypse Now wrote:Same smokin' wife too, curiously.WildGorillaMan wrote:Oddly enough, there are two different Jay Ashmans. Maybe from a parallel universe, but AFAIK they both have the "evil universe twin goatee" so who knows?
The couch thread
Moderator: Dux
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Re: The couch thread
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Re: The couch thread
ransack wrote:Brian Mackenzie facebook status update... 4 hrs in and hip shut down, shoes fell apart and an epic journey is squashed.
YUP EPIC FAIL YET AGAIN
=D> =D> =D> =D> =D> =D>
Looks like prayers and predictions were answered.friedquads sez on July 2nd wrote:I am praying that on B Mac N Cheeze's little 41 mile one-man race in Death Valley that he drops out in the middle of it. But knowing him, he'll write up some pathetic excuse for his performance saying that he failed but his method is still the best in the fucking world, similar to what his partner Methcalves wrote up after he dropped out of the Javalina 100.

The hip and shoe thing I declare bullshit on, especially on a 4-hour road run. His past experience crewing someone at Badwater should have been a guide. Run on hot asphalt, then you run on the damn white line to prevent the shoes from melting AND you have a few pairs of shoes in case a pair falls apart. The hip problem should have manifested itself either in doing exercises that are hip-driven or as Quack Attack said, during an LSD run. At minimum, doing some LSD work would have allowed his ass to adapt to the discomfort, POSE or no POSE running.
Best guess on the distance he covered before BMacNCheeze turned into Velveeta and oozed all over the Death Valley Basin was probably the minimum @FE limit of 13.1 but he probably hit closer to 16 unless he pissed away a good amount of time trying not to overheat.
I wonder if anyone is going to ask for a refund on the @FE cert now?
I choose to kill people with kindness. Oh, I should also mention "kindness" is the name of my samurai sword.Jay wrote:BTW, warriors kill shit. The only things you kill are exercise science and the board short display at Target.
Re: The couch thread
Good thing he spent a few hundred (or did he say a grand? I don't remember) on that personal sauna.
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Re: The couch thread
Also, relating to an earlier post.
There's no way in hell Greg's going to let loose the reins of the XF mothership unless he's moving on to something else. The man really enjoys the shit out of his creation and lecturing about it, boozin' it up, and getting strange.
There's no way in hell Greg's going to let loose the reins of the XF mothership unless he's moving on to something else. The man really enjoys the shit out of his creation and lecturing about it, boozin' it up, and getting strange.
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Re: The couch thread
Wait, you estimate that he hit 16 miles in 4 hours? If you're correct, that's absolutely pathetic. That means he was running a 15-minute mile, moving just 33% faster than your average fat-ass out-of-shape human (average walking speed per Wikipedia, 3 miles per hour). I hope for the love of humanity, he covered more than 16 miles in 4 hours. Shit, I can walk 16 miles in 4 hours while whistling Dixie.friedquads wrote:Best guess on the distance he covered before BMacNCheeze turned into Velveeta and oozed all over the Death Valley Basin was probably the minimum @FE limit of 13.1 but he probably hit closer to 16 unless he pissed away a good amount of time trying not to overheat.
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Re: The couch thread
Typical @Fit.
I love the epic failures these f@ggots undertake.
I love the epic failures these f@ggots undertake.
Re: The couch thread
Let's be serious here. Running through Death Valley on pace to cover 40-something miles is going to be slow, even if you're trained for it. Yes, the average guy can walk 15 minute miles on flat ground in comfortable conditions. But throw in elevation, extreme temperature, and the fatigue that comes after walking for an hour (have you ever brisk walked for an hour straight?), and the average dude would not be able to do that.JohnnyBadAss wrote:Wait, you estimate that he hit 16 miles in 4 hours? If you're correct, that's absolutely pathetic. That means he was running a 15-minute mile, moving just 33% faster than your average fat-ass out-of-shape human (average walking speed per Wikipedia, 3 miles per hour). I hope for the love of humanity, he covered more than 16 miles in 4 hours. Shit, I can walk 16 miles in 4 hours while whistling Dixie.friedquads wrote:Best guess on the distance he covered before BMacNCheeze turned into Velveeta and oozed all over the Death Valley Basin was probably the minimum @FE limit of 13.1 but he probably hit closer to 16 unless he pissed away a good amount of time trying not to overheat.
All that said, the hubris this guy has is astounding. It's even worse in person. I don't think it would be so bad if he just came out and said "in light of our failures/disappointments, we might have to change how we train." But he doesn't. I'm all for trying new things and whatever, but when something fails to work time and time again ... isn't that time to move on to something that works?
Re: The couch thread
NO! You need some STFU Therapy(c) !!kreator wrote:[ I'm all for trying new things and whatever, but when something fails to work time and time again ... isn't that time to move on to something that works?
"Know that! & Know it deep you fucking loser!"


Re: The couch thread
Are you unscared?protobuilder wrote:NO! You need some STFU Therapy(c) !!kreator wrote:[ I'm all for trying new things and whatever, but when something fails to work time and time again ... isn't that time to move on to something that works?
http://crossfitendurance.com/page/index ... ide&id=123
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Re: The couch thread
kreator wrote:Are you unscared?protobuilder wrote:NO! You need some STFU Therapy(c) !!kreator wrote:[ I'm all for trying new things and whatever, but when something fails to work time and time again ... isn't that time to move on to something that works?
http://crossfitendurance.com/page/index ... ide&id=123
Dunno, let me check my knuckles or a recent newborn baby of an @FE family.
I choose to kill people with kindness. Oh, I should also mention "kindness" is the name of my samurai sword.Jay wrote:BTW, warriors kill shit. The only things you kill are exercise science and the board short display at Target.
Re: The couch thread
WTF? LMAOUnscared:
Un (un) scared (skârd)
Created in CrossFit & CrossFit Endurance, as all others who don't CrossFit are scared.
"Know that! & Know it deep you fucking loser!"


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Re: The couch thread
CrossFit is an adult version of T-Ball. Everybody gets a trophy.
Shomer Shabbos.
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Re: The couch thread
Like a five leafed clover! A black dude doing @fit and a remarkably semi-sober and semi-lean couch. Lugo is a hot mess for sure! RE: B-Mac I have never (couch aside) met someone who is so arrogant in the face of repeated failure. If you give and assfitter shit about couch being fat or b-mac dnf'ing everything they start yelling about Pat Riley and Bill Belichick!! I will point out that those guys coached actual champions in actual sports and get called an asshole as I'm leaving
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Re: The couch thread
Ashman is good people. He's a strong dude who sipped a bit of kool aid before coming back to his senses.Ed Zachary wrote:Bwahahaha
Isn't Jay Ashman on the outs anyway?
I believe he may be mutual friends with some of our cohorts here.
I've been hearing rumblings recently that @fit HQ is a bit tired of getting it's ass handed to it by @fit Foosball. They seem to be losing more and more recruits to the young upstart and they just aren't real comfortable with it.
Re: B-Mac...I don't know why they don't put Dirt Diva or Shari Baby in charge of the endurance shit. They compete, finish, WIN, and take nekkid pictures of themselves. Instead, they prop up this self-absorbed, painted tool who hits the wall harder than Dale Earnhardt every time he runs more than 10K.
Re: The couch thread
Is that black guy banging both of them??CultBuster wrote:Like a five leafed clover! A black dude doing @fit and a remarkably semi-sober and semi-lean couch. Lugo is a hot mess for sure! RE: B-Mac I have never (couch aside) met someone who is so arrogant in the face of repeated failure. If you give and assfitter shit about couch being fat or b-mac dnf'ing everything they start yelling about Pat Riley and Bill Belichick!! I will point out that those guys coached actual champions in actual sports and get called an asshole as I'm leaving
"Know that! & Know it deep you fucking loser!"


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Re: The couch thread
Did Couch get Lauren's implants as part of a community property settlement and give them to Lisa?

Mao wrote:Political power grows out of the barrel of a gun. Our principle is that the Party commands the gun, and the gun must never be allowed to command the Party
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Re: The couch thread
couch wrote:We fail at the margins of our experience.
Ergo, failure at LSD. If one is going to follow a cult, might as well follow it to the letter.BMac 'n Cheez wrote:LSD sux. I no do LSD. LSD iz dum.
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Re: The couch thread
You know you've arrived when you start getting stuff sent to you.
http://wildgorillaman.blogspot.com/2010 ... ds-go.html
http://wildgorillaman.blogspot.com/2010 ... ds-go.html
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Re: The couch thread
I would do shit to Lisa Lugo you couldn't print in Penthouse Letters.
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Re: The couch thread
The fucking comments on that WGB Blog post are priceless and excellently trolled.
Robb Wolf said...
Her face looks like it caught on fire and her father tried to put it out with a rake.
July 6, 2010 12:40 PM
Anonymous said...
I thought the one on the right was Eva. Put a NSFW tag if you're going to show topless Andro girls.
July 6, 2010 12:51 PM
Gorilla's Numba One Fan said...
I'd hit it!*
*as long as Wanderlei wasn't around
July 6, 2010 1:03 PM
Anonymous said...
Hey Gorilla's numba one fan, show your face so I can see if you are hitworthy.
July 6, 2010 1:47 PM
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Re: The couch thread
Catch Couch's VD?Mickey O'neil wrote:I would do shit to Lisa Lugo you couldn't print in Penthouse Letters.
Re: The couch thread
Official diagosis is a torn tfl/glute medius.
No, it's not the training.
No, it's not the training.
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Re: The couch thread
Way to lock up my fucking computer!Are you unscared?
http://crossfitendurance.com/page/index ... ide&id=123
"I am the author of my own misfortune, I don't need a ghost writer" - Ian Dury
"Legio mihi nomen est, quia multi sumus."
"Legio mihi nomen est, quia multi sumus."
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Re: The couch thread
How far did your computer get before it DNF'ed?tough old man wrote:Way to lock up my fucking computer!Are you unscared?
http://crossfitendurance.com/page/index ... ide&id=123
Oh, and a big thank you to Team Gorilla for representing what's great about Crossfit. Winners, all.
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Re: The couch thread
What? You mean that injury shit like that still happens when on a diet of POSE running and living off of intervals & time-trial runs. Say it ain't so!kreator wrote:Official diagosis is a torn tfl/glute medius.
No, it's not the training.
](https://www.irongarmx.net/phpbbdev/images/smilies/eusa_wall.gif)
Looks like BitchMac is going to semi-retire from running for the next six months and will go paddling. He'll probably ruin that for the surfing community and make a surfing/paddling cert with the Couch's blessing.
I choose to kill people with kindness. Oh, I should also mention "kindness" is the name of my samurai sword.Jay wrote:BTW, warriors kill shit. The only things you kill are exercise science and the board short display at Target.