The couch thread

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WildGorillaMan
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Re: The couch thread

Post by WildGorillaMan »

Cave Canem wrote:
Yes I Have Balls wrote:
Ash Uber Alles wrote:what the fuck is a clapping thruster?
Clapping thrusters is for insects.

Sweet gorilla jeebus...is there no end to the dumbassery ?

There really isn't. I was on YouTube trying to find the video of that skinny twat who invented the snatch jump to a box, only to discover that like a pathogenic microbe that stupid fucking bullshit empty bar "exercise" has propagated, and now there's dozens of videos of fuckers doing it.

Gorilla Jeebus save me.

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Jay
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Jay »

Friedquads, thank you for the screenshot...

I was notified of that status from a friend and I just got too damn lazy to do that and decided a mass copy and paste would be easier.

This is going to be fun to watch unfold.

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msr2112
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Re: The couch thread

Post by msr2112 »

The man in black wrote:http://www.supertraininggym.com/images/ ... 1-9-11.pdf

A powerlifting meet with a crossfit division? What the flying fuck is this horse shit? Is this something where all the real powerlifters squat with a 60 pound Mastadon bar and the crossfit class uses a ladies' O-lifting bar?
I'm actually doing this meet on Sunday. Not the CF division. It's going to be interesting. Mark Bell is lifting in it and wants to hit a 2600. Phil Stevens is trying to hit a 804 raw deadlift it, too. My goal is a more modest one but I'm interested to see how many CFers come out and how they do. There's actually quite a lot of them that do the powerlifts in our gym along with their CF stuff. Some of them are stronger than you might think.
Everybody wanna be a bodybuilder, but nobody wanna lift this heavy-ass weight!! -Ronnie Coleman

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lasalle
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Re: The couch thread

Post by lasalle »

WildGorillaMan wrote:
](*,) I wouldn't have believed you without video.

It is functional though, right? ](*,)

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WildGorillaMan
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Re: The couch thread

Post by WildGorillaMan »

lasalle wrote:
It is functional though, right? ](*,)
No, not in the slightest.
Video Description wrote:Amazing show of athleticism for a big man. 325 lb Offensive lineman performs 30" Snatch Box Jump.
You know what's an amazing show of athleticism for a big man? A 250kg Clean and Jerk. This doesn't quite measure up.
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Shafpocalypse Now
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Shafpocalypse Now »

The former mrs. couch.

She makes me feel funny.


Jason
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Jason »

How are those box jump/ snatches any different than this?

Good stuff starts at 1:23 and I'm pretty sure you guys worhsip him here:

And let’s not forget SHAF the pajama clad postulator extolling opinions on a dozen different fitness forums 10 to 12 hours a day including major holidays.

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Shafpocalypse Now
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Shafpocalypse Now »

Some of those guys barely made it up on the table if I remember right


Jason
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Jason »

Yeah, a massage table. At least the other guys used a real box for their jumps. And not in front of a window.
And let’s not forget SHAF the pajama clad postulator extolling opinions on a dozen different fitness forums 10 to 12 hours a day including major holidays.

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Herv100
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Herv100 »

Jason wrote:How are those box jump/ snatches any different than this?

Good stuff starts at 1:23 and I'm pretty sure you guys worhsip him here:

LOL, If forgot about that! Total entertainment training with a ridiculous risk/reward ratio. I'm sure it sells, but whatever.
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Sassenach
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Sassenach »

WildGorillaMan wrote:
The fuck?!

I don't even know where to start for that other than --

WHY THE FUCK DO S&C COACHES INSIST ON MAKING BIG PEOPLE DO DUMB SHIT?!
Kazuya Mishima wrote:they can pry the bacon from my cold dead hand.

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Sassenach
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Sassenach »

Some good old fashioned @fitter FUMKSHUNUL FITNEZZ dumbassery:

http://board.crossfit.com/showthread.ph ... post885284
Hi.

I'm having a bit of a hard time rationalizing why I should or should not wear weightlifting shoes in the gym since I don't wear them when I actually have to lift or carry stuff out in the real world.

I'm looking for arguments or links or studies explaining how these things are safer or make you a better athlete OUTSIDE the gym who's better able to respond to all the things that police/military/fire/rescue or whomever have to do at short notice, with non-standard unbalanced weights in whatever situations where you're wearing boots or regular shoes or no shoes.

Just seems like all they do is make you more stable than you would be in the real world, and doesn't really promote paying enough attention to getting your balance and footing correct when you're outside the gym.

I understand that a lot of people just want big numbers on the white board - I'm a bit more concerned with prepping for when your performance really matters. Functional fitness to get you "fit for life" and all that good stuff.

Thoughts? Links? Studies?

Edit: I've used them on and off for 1-2 years and generally they help me by at least 20-30# and make my horrible lifting issues (I'm massively inflexible, working on it) a lot easier.
Is everyone at @fit training to be a first responder? What the fuck?
Kazuya Mishima wrote:they can pry the bacon from my cold dead hand.


Yes, I'm drunk
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Yes, I'm drunk »

Is everyone at @fit training to be a first responder? What the fuck?
And most of them train barefoot anyway, which is fine, but as far as functional carryover is concerned it's only applicable to bathroom-based rape scenarios.

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Shafpocalypse Now
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Shafpocalypse Now »

Ontario, Canada: The first?

I've mentioned it in a couple other threads, but we have a new program at work to have a half dozen peer fitness councillors who get ACE certified to help co-workers with exercise programs. I put my name in as a counter balance to the 4 crossfit nutters who put their names in. It's a brand new program, which hasn't even officially begun yet other than discussions over what type of training advice and programs should be suggested. Of course I'm very, very anti-crossfit, which has caused some debate.

Anyhow, the day before yesterday, 3 of the CF nutters put one of our 51 year old firefighters through his first CF workout. He used to be a great athlete and was still a fantastic hockey player, however in the last couple years he had gained significant weight. He made the NewYear's resolution to get back in decent condition and went to a couple of other guys for advice. The CF nutters convinced him CF was the program to get him back as fast as possible and they would be happy to put him through his first workout.

So....... he finished his first CF workout Monday evening and then went home. The next morning he didn't show up for work. The guys at his station called and then took the fire truck over after getting no answer. (he lives alone) They found him face down on his living room floor, still in his workout sweats.

autopsy yesterday...........should get results today. I'm going to go ahead now and predict a great big myocardial infraction.

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WildGorillaMan
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Re: The couch thread

Post by WildGorillaMan »

There was one last March, remember?
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Shafpocalypse Now
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Shafpocalypse Now »

Now I do recall that.


tzg
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Re: The couch thread

Post by tzg »

Shafpocalypse Now wrote:Ontario, Canada: The first?

I've mentioned it in a couple other threads, but we have a new program at work to have a half dozen peer fitness councillors who get ACE certified to help co-workers with exercise programs. I put my name in as a counter balance to the 4 crossfit nutters who put their names in. It's a brand new program, which hasn't even officially begun yet other than discussions over what type of training advice and programs should be suggested. Of course I'm very, very anti-crossfit, which has caused some debate.

Anyhow, the day before yesterday, 3 of the CF nutters put one of our 51 year old firefighters through his first CF workout. He used to be a great athlete and was still a fantastic hockey player, however in the last couple years he had gained significant weight. He made the NewYear's resolution to get back in decent condition and went to a couple of other guys for advice. The CF nutters convinced him CF was the program to get him back as fast as possible and they would be happy to put him through his first workout.

So....... he finished his first CF workout Monday evening and then went home. The next morning he didn't show up for work. The guys at his station called and then took the fire truck over after getting no answer. (he lives alone) They found him face down on his living room floor, still in his workout sweats.

autopsy yesterday...........should get results today. I'm going to go ahead now and predict a great big myocardial infraction.
RIP. What a tragedy.

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syaigh
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Re: The couch thread

Post by syaigh »

How awful. And its so sad that he was alone. Rest in peace.
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Mountebank »

RIP.

Has which workout it was come out yet?


toddmr

Re: The couch thread

Post by toddmr »

[removed stupid question answered on other thread]

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WildGorillaMan
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Re: The couch thread

Post by WildGorillaMan »

tzg wrote:
Shafpocalypse Now wrote:Ontario, Canada: The first?

I've mentioned it in a couple other threads, but we have a new program at work to have a half dozen peer fitness councillors who get ACE certified to help co-workers with exercise programs. I put my name in as a counter balance to the 4 crossfit nutters who put their names in. It's a brand new program, which hasn't even officially begun yet other than discussions over what type of training advice and programs should be suggested. Of course I'm very, very anti-crossfit, which has caused some debate.

Anyhow, the day before yesterday, 3 of the CF nutters put one of our 51 year old firefighters through his first CF workout. He used to be a great athlete and was still a fantastic hockey player, however in the last couple years he had gained significant weight. He made the NewYear's resolution to get back in decent condition and went to a couple of other guys for advice. The CF nutters convinced him CF was the program to get him back as fast as possible and they would be happy to put him through his first workout.

So....... he finished his first CF workout Monday evening and then went home. The next morning he didn't show up for work. The guys at his station called and then took the fire truck over after getting no answer. (he lives alone) They found him face down on his living room floor, still in his workout sweats.

autopsy yesterday...........should get results today. I'm going to go ahead now and predict a great big myocardial infraction.
RIP. What a tragedy.
Shaf, are you willing to link your source? No problem if you don't, but I ask in the interest of transparency.
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Gin Master »

The man in black wrote:http://www.supertraininggym.com/images/ ... 1-9-11.pdf

A powerlifting meet with a crossfit division? What the flying fuck is this horse shit? Is this something where all the real powerlifters squat with a 60 pound Mastadon bar and the crossfit class uses a ladies' O-lifting bar?
Everybody wins a kewpie doll.

When your truths are divined through competition rather than debate, you have to plan your competitions accordingly.

Still, this is progress.

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Shafpocalypse Now
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Re: The couch thread

Post by Shafpocalypse Now »

It's from a poster on Lyle McDonald's Monkey Island. You can read it there yourself in the "Hatin'" forum.


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Re: The couch thread

Post by Shapecharge »

Okay, so maybe this is worth a small chuckle. I had a New Year's Eve party at my house. Around 15-18 people. My neighbors are there and one of the neighbor wives is a personal trainer...I put her around late 30's maybe early 40's. Pretty, and she's in shape as far as her appearance is concerned. She'll come out and push the prowler and pull the sled when I have it out in the street. So it's around 3:00 in the morning and things are winding down and she wants to talk about @Fit. I really didn't see this coming and didn't even think about the possibility of her getting into it but I'm pretty fucked up at this point. So I was trying to be cool but I did tell her to not get totally consumed, to think about the programming etc. Anyway it gets mentioned how much stronger she's gotten. So I say, show me. So we go into my power center and I put 135 on the bar and ask her to deadlift it. As she approaches the bar to pick it up I realize that she doesn't know how to deadlift even though she says she does. After a very brief technique review she picks it up somewhat slowly. She wants more so I bump it up to 165...no go. My other neighbor's wife, who's 58, with a giant fake rack, totally trashed, who walks for exercise on occasion and nothing else wants to try it. I'm trying to be somewhat responsible and mention that this isn't you so just be trying to try but she insists...kicks off her heels, I demo a conventional deadlift, she reaches down grabs the bar, looks up, and stands up with it. Never done one in her life. Slight drama afterwards.

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WildGorillaMan
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Re: The couch thread

Post by WildGorillaMan »

Shafpocalypse Now wrote:It's from a poster on Lyle McDonald's Monkey Island. You can read it there yourself in the "Hatin'" forum.
Thanks.
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